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This reminds me of a funny bit from Hesiod Work and days 375 that a classicist friend shared with me way back:
"Do not be deceived by a woman who decorates her buttocks, coaxing you with wily words - she is after your granary."
("Decorates her buttocks" means dressing to accentuate the rear)
Or to paraphrase it as my friend did:
"Don't get taken in by a thick girl, even if she has good chat - she'll dine and dash on your dumb ass."
I dunno though, I kinda like the simpler form
I don't get these translations. We don't use some of those words anymore. The only reason "doth" etc are used is to make it sounds old and more mysterious. It's a fucking translation though. Translate it using words in modern English. "Doth" went away with "thou" when it was replaced with singular "you." When "you" was plural, fine, but that hasn't been the case for centuries. The original author didn't write it that way. It's purely the choice of the translator.
(Potentially this is an old translation from back when those words were in use. It doesn't make it more accurate still though, just less understandable and relatable.)
I'm with you, the "improved" translation is too verbose, tries to hard, and assumes that all poetry has to rhyme.
trying too hard is like, 95% of poetry
I'll be in the opposing camp.
Paraphrasing the wiki article, poetry is about the "aesthetic and rhythmic qualities of language" being used to evoke meaning, beyond the surface level.
This is captured well in the "proper" translation, and while it definitely suffers from the use of archaic words, it does express the situation in a much more interesting way than the alternative "love phat ass but gurl can't move".
The same logic applies to the masterpiece "I love big butts and I cannot lie", which expresses the same affection for emphatic posteriors, but does so by making a distinctive use of the rhythmic characteristics of the language. Ie., MC Hammer is a proper poet (but the song is actually by Sir Mix-a-Lot, my mistake)
(Edit for typos and clarity)
MC Hammer is a proper poet.
I think that was actually Sir Mix-a-lot?
You are absolutely correct, my bad. Fixed
Nah, in the short version, I knew what he was talking about. The improved version was so incomprehensible, that I had no idea he was talking about her ass, which is apparently so enormous it makes it hard for her to even move.
Sure, rhythm, structure, even how the words are being printed on a page are used as poetic elements in modern poetry. Often, pure sound is used, meaningless, fictional words, decomposed elements of a given language, syllables.
But modern poetry has moved away from long standing, fixed rhyme schemes and meter. This, along with the use of anachrononistic language, gives the translation a dated feel. I'm aware of the age of the poem, but I don't feel the ultimate goal of a translation must always be perfect accuracy to the source material and its historical context. In fact, poetry often suffers from such endeavors.
I agree with most of your points, but not the last one. I think it's perfectly OK to take an ancient work of poetry and produce a modern adaptation. This happens for many, many texts - where you can choose between a modern version that is easier to read and more "engaging" and relatable, or a more classical version where the translator tries to maintain the original nuance, structure, rhythm.
I don't know Arabic at all so I can't tell for sure, but the translation in the book just seems like a very poor attempt at translation, and so it fails as a modern adaptation, and fails as a "classical" translation. It's just bad. :)
She's clapping for two, got it.
She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty
HEEEEEY BIG BOOTY
Someone on Reddit said the term 'ردف' is used, which is apparently both 'buttocks' and 'follows', but I don't speak Arabic so I can't confirm which version is closer. Google Translate would seem to suggest that the original poster is closer (if still taking some translation liberties)
Sounds like English "behind" which means both as well
Man, what kinda ass we talking here that she gets tired just moving? Badonkadumptruck? Does it literally drag on the ground behind her?
An ass like an onion, makes you wanna cry.
It had layers
"Muslims are all religious fanatics that kill you if you have impure thoughts!!"
Muslims, 1000~ years ago:
Now I really need to see the full thing.
The poem or the arse/ass?
yes