this post was submitted on 07 Nov 2025
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ADHD memes

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ADHD Memes

The lighter side of ADHD

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Find a direction with which to off and go fuck in it (lemmy.dbzer0.com)
submitted 5 days ago by Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/adhd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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[–] elucubra@sopuli.xyz 44 points 5 days ago (3 children)

I was explaining to my sister about how my diagnosis, as an older adult, was going, and how it explained many things in my life. She immediately told me she suspects she has it, because she has a short attention span.

She is an elementary school principal, who leads a perfectly organized life, set on a path in her 20's and has followed it to the letter, she has an insanely well set up financial structure, budgets to the cent, is learning a third language in her spare time, leads a regimented daily schedule, even on weekends and vacations.

Yeah.

[–] 0x0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I mean, it's not a contest.

I feel like people might have said the same thing about me before I started burning out and had to go back on the stimulants.

If this is your biological sister, keep in mind that ADHD runs in families and presents differently in women.

[–] devfuuu@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I sometimes get out of bed and eat at least twice a day. So I got that going for me.

Just reading what you described tired my soul.

[–] HeurtisticAlgorithm9@feddit.uk 3 points 4 days ago

Oh fuck, I forgot to eat today. I literally went and bought some earlier too. It's fine, I'll eat tomorrow...

[–] Rooster326@programming.dev 2 points 4 days ago

So I got that going for me. Which is nice

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 9 points 5 days ago

A lot of this applies to me and I've been to a bunch of therapists for ADHD.

I'm doing the career for which I went to school, but I find fast-paced jobs. I know all sorts of useful stuff from decades of unfocused Wikipedia, which creates a "Texas sharpshooter" illusion of organized education. If I don't put something on the schedule, then don't count on it happening at all.

[–] fascicle@leminal.space 29 points 5 days ago (6 children)

Isnt it why its called a spectrum

[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 34 points 5 days ago (3 children)

The last D is for disorder. If you have ADHD, it's not cute and relatable, it's making your life worse to the point of needing to be addressed. Everybody having "a little ADHD" is a way of trivializing the level of actual problems that are required for it to be called a disorder.

[–] NoTagBacks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

This is the correct answer and I feel it's very important to emphasize this point. You can have "symptoms" of whatever the fuck, but in order for it to be considered a disorder, it must disrupt your life in some way. I usually lean more into the camp of just trying to be supportive of people when they speak about mental health disorders, but there are definitely those kids out there self-diagnosing disorders like they're collecting pokemon. As someone who legitimately has been diagnosed with multiple disorders by actual licensed psychological professionals, it's aggravating to see those kids infantilize mental health in that capacity, where it perpetuates the already uphill battle for many of us to be taken seriously in the first place. ADHD has absolutely ruined my life and I would absolutely(in a hypothetical) take a relatively high chance of death at "curing" my ADHD without a single hesitation. Life is hard enough with all these fucking disorders, definitely don't need the added burden of always feeling like I have to prove that I really am that fucked up.

[–] i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Fucking spot on. I feel this way about most of my disorders, except ASD. My ASD is a part of me, though it does have its downsides.

The ADHD is the most significant, though. If I could just remove this anchor from my brain, my quality of life would skyrocket. I don't find it a "superpower" at all. I am not exaggerating when I say that it has stolen my childhood and early adulthood, and from the outside it looks like laziness or a lack of discipline. Solidarity.

[–] Daikeyedunce34@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 5 days ago

There’s an element at play here that communicates an issue with how society treats you. I would argue that ADHD just by the curiosity and random attention it can focus on spawns an interesting idea of creativity in being drawn by and interested in all sorts of ideas that may have no overlap.

[–] lonefighter@sh.itjust.works 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Yes. I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD until I was in my 30s. By then I had already spent my entire life hating myself for being an utter failure because I couldn't figure out why just having a simple existence felt like trying to climb Mount fucking Everest every goddamn day and why my brain always feels like scrambled eggs. I've been passively suicidal most of my life because even as a kid the adults in my life openly compared me to my peers and found me sorely lacking, and as an adult I mourn the life I want and can't seem to achieve. I feel like my entire existence has been me throwing myself at the bars of a giant cage labelled ADHD and I can't get myself out or find the key and people come stand outside the door and watch me and say things like "everyone has focus issues" and "you just need to try harder" and my personal fucking favorite "nothing in your brain is impossible to fix if you're willing to put in the effort, you just are unwilling to change".

My ADHD has taken everything from me. I have no friends, not even online, I've dropped out of school multiple times, I struggle at work, I struggle to emotionally regulate, I've only ever had two relationships and I was dumped by text from the person I was married to and ghosted from the other.

I actually have an okay paying job now, but I fully expect I will die alone and broke because the chances of me ever being able to keep a career that pays well enough to stay ahead in this economy are slim to none. I have no idea how to make or keep friends, and I can't bear the thought of getting attached to someone else only to get ghosted again.

I'd do anything to not have ADHD. Sure I'll laugh and make ADHD jokes with everyone else, but my life would be so different if my brain would fucking work (or if I would have been diagnosed sooner and learned coping mechanisms and self love sooner).

[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

The mourning for what could have been, that's a heavy weight. And the shame of not being enough for others expectations. I've been very lucky in that I found something to study with enough structure and novelty that got me through college, but it was not what I started out with. I didn't even realize about the ADHD until the depression got bad enough to seek help in my 30s (after a year of not working and somebody helping me to make my first appointment) and the psych noticed all my coping mechanisms fit. She got me assessed and medicated. That came with its own challenges, but it made a world of difference in my relationships, my hobbies, self care, etc. That would be my biggest recommendation if you're not already, to get on meds (also, apologies if you're just looking to vent and not for advice). It won't fix everything or give you back what you've lost, but it can make things more manageable. And if you're like so many others that can't afford to seek professional help, then many find some relief with nicotine and caffeine.

[–] lonefighter@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 days ago

Thanks, it's good to be heard. I am medicated, but that only gets me from completely nonfunctional to nail biting my way through life. Unfortunately I'm not able to use caffeine either, low amounts are ok, but anything more than a cup of tea leaves me extremely depressed, tired, and physically ill. After a lot of research (actually reading academic papers, not YouTube, lol) I've just started cautiously experimenting with micro dosing and it could very well be the placebo effect, but it seems to be working a little better than my meds. Of course it's illegal as all hell where I am and if I get caught I can kiss my job goodbye forever.

[–] thermal_shock@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (4 children)

To be fair, with the amount of shit bombarded in your face with a dozen devices, everything fighting for your attention including ads on your vehicle infotainment, there is a zero chance that most people havent developed some sort of ADHD, whether clinically diagnosed or not. Disorders evolved also.

Try sitting in a room for 10-15 minutes and do absolutely nothing, just sit with your thoughts. I'm willing to bet most people can't.

[–] Taco2112@lemmy.world 18 points 5 days ago

As someone diagnosed with ADHD, I can easily sit quietly in a room with my own thoughts for 20+ minutes.

What I can’t seem to do is make the two simple phone calls I need to make and write the one page report that I need to write before the end of the week. That’s literally all I need to do today, I’ve been at my desk for two hours and have done none of it. If I got that done now, I could coast the rest of my work day but instead I’m going to sit here and stress for a few more hours before I finally do any of it. Why? I can’t tell you because I don’t know.

[–] RicoBerto@piefed.blahaj.zone 15 points 5 days ago

The symptoms of ADHD happen to be things all people deal with. The inability to pay attention to things, or the restlessness of a quiet room are universal experiences. In that part you are kind of right. However ADHD specifically refers to the actual clinical deficit in executive function representing a chemical difference in the brain. Saying "Everyone has a little ADHD" is just a condescending way to put it. Different people may have different levels of annoyance with the phrase.

Everyone gets sad, not everyone has depression. Everyone worries, not everyone has General Anxiety Disorder. Everyone has pains sometimes, not everyone has Chronic Pain.

The sentiment isnt necessarily wrong, and the colloquial meaning still comes across, but it's just degrading to hear. I hate hearing someone call out a disorder as one of their quirks as much as the next guy, but more than being mildly annoying it can stand to change the perception of the thing in the public consciousness enough that someone that has a disorder might believe they are just making a big deal out of something that "everyone" deals with. Whether intended or not just keep that in mind.

(TLDR I have ADHD please don't minimize it by saying stuff like "lol computers destroy attention span", you're not wrong, just condescending.)

[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 9 points 5 days ago

Christ, that is a trite oversimplification or complete misunderstanding. ADHD includes worse outcomes in employment (lower wages, difficulty keeping jobs), relationships (impulsivity can lead to anything from speaking before processing to forgetting plans to seeking out more stimulating things in lieu of relationships), health (higher rates of car accidents, higher use of recreational drugs, difficulty with self care), and a bunch of other things. It doesn't "develop" over time from looking at your phone. Please please please do some actual reading of things by experts in the field on it before saying this sort of thing again.

[–] NoTagBacks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 5 days ago

ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, either you're born with it or you're not. Sure, lots of things fight for our attention and that probably affects us in some way, but distractability isn't the same thing as ADHD. It's primarily a regulation disorder rather than 'can't focus disease'. Where I think you bring up a good point in a mechanism that probably reveals ADHD in some people, I would definitely give pushback on what appears to be a suggestion that the advertising industry as it exists causes ADHD. I don't think any serious psychological professional would make that assertion.

[–] paultimate14@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago

"D" is "disorder". This means that the symptoms need to be clinically significant.

Everyone has occasional symptoms ghat are consistent with ADHD, but they need to be clinically significant to be considered ADHD.

I do think these sorts of memes are a bit... Icky. It kind of has the same vibes as the stories of women coming out as gay and their grandmother's saying "well everyone is attracted to women". Because it's very possible that the person downplaying the significance is themselves undiagnosed or in denial. Or maybe the individual thinks their symptoms are not severe enough to be diagnosed when, in reality, it would be. And that also leads into discussions about the difficulty of diagnosis, the way it changes over time, the way that ADHD is considers by many ti be over-diagnosed in young boys and under-diagnosed in young girls, etc.

I also think that there's it's dangerous to try to carve up humanity with stark lines. That leads to societal divisions and dehumanization. The sentiment of "everyone is a little bit ADHD" can often come from a place of "we are all humans and I am trying to relate to you the best that I can". The sentiment CAN be harmful when people are trying to downplay the significance, or even deny the existence of, disorders.

[–] Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe 8 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Spectrum doesn't mean the average person experiences the regular disruption to their lives.

"Spectrum" refers to how much it interferes with a person's ability to function.

The average person also doesn't have the comorbidities - so clearly they don't have "a little ADHD".

[–] SchmidtGenetics@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

That doesn’t mean everyone is in it.

[–] Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Exactly.

Everyone certainly experience aspects of ADHD (distraction, loss of focus, etc) to some degree during their lives, but not on a continuous basis, sufficient to disrupt their lives.

People who say dumb shit like this can kiss my ass. They need to have their dominant arm tied behind their back for a month, just to get some idea how difficult it can be.

[–] Junkers_Klunker@feddit.dk 7 points 5 days ago

Whenever people say dumb shit around me I usually just say “everybody goes to the toilet, but if you do it 20 times a day there might be a problem” and then they usually shut up.

[–] mrmacduggan@lemmy.ml 2 points 5 days ago

Yeah, my comeback to this is usually "and some of us have plenty to spare"

[–] elucubra@sopuli.xyz 1 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I don't really believe it's a spectrum. I believe that you either have a dopamine processing deficiency, or you don't. I think the differences we see are the result of how well some of us learn to cope, or devise self protecting strategies.

I mean, there may be slight differences, but I wouldn't call it a spectrum, at least in the way that autism is, where you have mildly socially incompetent people to nearly non functional people.

I was undiagnosed bipolar for over 40 years, masked by my success in employment and entrepreneurship, which lasted about 2-5 years every stage, when tedium became unbearable, and had to look for other challenges to fuel my dopamine. No one, even myself, connected the dots between my intense drive, and the following depressive stage, and the next jump. I finally crashed hard, and sought a psychiatryst. Once properly medicated, my mood swings normalized, the ADHD symptoms were unmasked.

Now we are working on dialing in meds for ADHD. Pretty hard to balance.

In my case I belive I don't more or less ADHD than others, but that I was good at (extreme) damage control.

My opinion.

[–] egerlach@lemmy.ca 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

The problem is that "ADHD" is not defined as a dopamine processing deficiency. It's defined as a cluster of symptoms that exceed a certain level. Those symptoms could be related to dopamine processing, or something else! So you're not wrong, in any real sense, but you are wrong by the definition set out by those who say what ADHD is.

I hate the DSM.

[–] elucubra@sopuli.xyz 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

A very dear friend, who is a psychiatrist, says that the DSM is mostly to help GPs to identify symptoms, to be able to send people to the psychiatrist, not to actually diagnose.

[–] egerlach@lemmy.ca 1 points 4 days ago

I hate that in a sense you're right. The problem is that in a practical sense it's become so much more than that, too. So due to the law of unintended consequences, the psychiatrists that wrote the manual have built their own prison (if you'll excuse the mixed metaphors).

To me, it seems that psychiatrists/psychologists need one manual for GPs, another manual amongst themselves, and a third written to placate US insurance companies. Right now they all use the DSM because it's the only thing.

[–] monkeyman512@lemmy.world 10 points 5 days ago

Yes. Most disorders are built of characteristics the almost all humans share. The difference is that the expression of it is so extreme that it active prevents you from functioning on a regular basis.

[–] NotSteve_@piefed.ca 10 points 5 days ago

I would sort of do that in a "well yeah I do that too" sort of way but just recently found out I actually have ADHD lol

[–] etherphon@lemmy.world 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Before this everyone had OCD.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago

Could everyone get something I don't have?

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

This is me but with SA...