this post was submitted on 09 May 2025
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[–] Blep@hexbear.net 2 points 6 hours ago

The strive source code leak

[–] barf@vegantheoryclub.org 2 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

The Challenger disaster

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 2 points 9 hours ago

Because of woke, a little seed dropped. Because of woke, a worm got bopped. Because of woke, that worm got mad. Because of woke, he kicked a tree. Because of woke, a coconut dropped.

[–] merthyr1831@lemmy.ml 7 points 18 hours ago

my toilet water being red when I'm done pooping

[–] buh@hexbear.net 13 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Because of woke
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of woke
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of woke
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of woke, I am afraid

[–] Guamer@hexbear.net 4 points 17 hours ago

Out of many funny responses, this one wins

[–] Lussy@hexbear.net 8 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

High egg prices, because there is more demand for eggs because of trans wokes, and it’s increasing the damn prices to $16 a carton of a dozen eggs.

Everyone wants to be a fucking egg now, because of woke

[–] daniyeg@hexbear.net 7 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

you see how all UI elements got their edges rounded? that's because woke stole them

[–] alexandra_kollontai@hexbear.net 2 points 8 hours ago

Can't even be edgy anymore. Because of woke

The random name generator in Stardew Valley

The kicker? This came up while cycling through random names for a void chicken.

[–] Angel@hexbear.net 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That time a white manager of mine banned me, the only Black person working at this place at the time, from saying the line, "If ya don't know, now ya know," because it became a bit of a catchphrase of mine while at work and the song originally ends it with the n-word so she thought it could've probably offended someone just to hear me say that line even without the n-word

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 6 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (1 children)

What's the song for those of us that don't know?

...i'm not making a setup joke/reference to the line i really do actually want to know

[–] Angel@hexbear.net 6 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

The Notorious B.I.G. - Juicy

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 5 points 23 hours ago

noted for later

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 5 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

Burnt toast. a-little-trolling us-foreign-policy

Previoisly blamed on putin-wink hacking the SMART toaster.

[–] Lucien@mander.xyz 12 points 1 day ago

I had to stop sleeping. Because of woke.

[–] GenderIsOpSec@hexbear.net 14 points 1 day ago

vegan chocolate bars are so tiny when compared to regular ones because of woke angery just let me be a trash mammal goddamnit

[–] dom@hexbear.net 24 points 1 day ago

Not getting enough sleep angery

[–] Barabas@hexbear.net 8 points 23 hours ago

Had to unclog a toilet. On account of woke.

[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 11 points 1 day ago

me spending 10 hours over engineering a solution to a problem i made up

[–] Antiwork@hexbear.net 14 points 1 day ago

My neck, my back….

[–] stinky7@hexbear.net 9 points 1 day ago

can't post beanis anymore, because of woke

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 11 points 1 day ago

Woke is why Liberace had a candelabra on his piano

[–] Owl@hexbear.net 9 points 1 day ago
[–] HumongousChungus@hexbear.net 6 points 1 day ago