this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2025
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Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

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[–] VerilyFemme@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 9 hours ago

This is the plot of an episode of The Office

[–] grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 8 hours ago

The only one I call "babe" is my dog. And he's deaf so I don't think he cares.

[–] Rozauhtuno@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 8 hours ago

Just say 'melon' a bunch of times.

[–] affiliate@lemmy.world 3 points 15 hours ago

this would be in violation of the 8th amendment

[–] introvertcatto@lemmy.blahaj.zone 27 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 16 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (1 children)

The way is shut
It is kept by those who are dead
The way is shut.

[–] weirdbeardgame@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago

*It is kept by those who are married ... And have a really awkward relationship

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 23 points 23 hours ago

And their tone keeps changing so you can't tell if it's sarcasm or not

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 13 points 21 hours ago

Just call them babe too, and feign ignorance when they say that’s not their name.

[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 10 points 22 hours ago

You escape by finding the six-shooter in the office desk loaded with one bullet.

[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 8 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Babe I can handle.

Progressive extensions of "My wittle hunny-bunny shnookie-wookums"...?

I'm turning them into a fine mist with my bare hands.

[–] Blueteamsecguy@infosec.pub 2 points 13 hours ago

I say these.

It pisses her off and she hates it being the reason, and it's hilarious to me

[–] Ste41th@lemmy.ml 8 points 23 hours ago

And they say it quietly then loudly just to annoy you some more

[–] chtk@feddit.nl 3 points 21 hours ago

Is the couple Kristen Wiig and Jason Sudeikis, in character as the two a-holes?

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 4 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Hey, hey, we have laws about torture.

[–] callouscomic@lemm.ee 2 points 14 hours ago

You have laws?

[–] rImITywR@lemmy.world 4 points 23 hours ago

You took me by the hand

[–] criitz@reddthat.com 1 points 21 hours ago

No you're schmoopi!

[–] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 1 points 22 hours ago

I'm more of a darlin' kind of person.