oh yea rim-jobs sexy

As for us naturalists, the fires of Hell, heck the 65×10¹⁶° core of the sun, won't matter much after we die. Our nerves will no longer trigger from heat or pain; our eyes will no longer respond to light; our ears will no longer respond to sound, our brain will no longer processes nervous signals, or formulate reason, or surrender to faith, or feel joy and despair. We won't notice the passage of time, or our existence.

Once I am dead, the main sequence of the sun will pass by in a blink, as will the next billion years as it expands into a red giant and engulfs the earth. I will be long gone, as will (very likely) all the rest of the human species and any notions of Jesus or Adonai.

For dust you are, and to dust you shall return

Or as Carl said, we are made of star-stuff.

Without another thought, the sun will cool to a white dwarf, the last remnant of a sun whose system once hosted life. The universe will go on, never noticing humankind once existed and does no longer.

FYI Satan, and Satanism, are part of Christianity, not atheism.

Oh, yeah, we technically understand that most Christians say the deal is "Keep doing terrible things, just say you're sorry." Jeffrey Dahmer: heaven. His victims: at least some in hell. Not a bad deal for terrible people. Or maybe just, you can masturbate whenever you want as long as you feel really guilty about it afterwards. That definitely sounds as enjoyable as our experience.

Well, Christians should be enjoying life to the fullest, and yeah, some do. This was part of the Protestant reformation. Sola fide tells us that faith alone (that of a mustard seed) should be enough for salvation. Sola scriptura (by scripture alone) are we to determine our path.

It should be easy then. A protestant pilgrim can relax, knowing their faith is enough, that what they take from the bible, whether cherry-picking Paul's cruelty or Jesus' generosity is right, because the self is the ultimate arbiter in how to read scripture.

Except not so much. The conflict is with the ministries and apologists who assert they and not the common layman, decides how to read the bible, and according to most of them, faith is wanting and grace doesn't fully bridge the gap. According to most ministries, a lot of Chistians are going to Hell. Especially so those of false denominations.

The exception is, of course universalists, but according to them, demon rimjobs take place in Heaven and everyone gets salvation. Period.

So, it depends on who you ask. The confident Protestant pilgrim will tell you that God is reasonable and sets a very low bar for salvation. A college try modified by your circumstances (say China's 720 million nonbelievers) is adequate to escape hellfire. But according to the ministries, Heaven is empty except for a handul at the top of their leaderbard. And that excludes you as well.

So you might hope that Hell is more compex a place than a lake of fire and the dwelling of Ammit the Devourer.