...what exactly are you cautioning me against?
Coffee? Kids? Escalators?
Yeah all that plus some other stuff. Capitalism probably
Capitalism Probably
By Friedrich Marx
Fuck I want some percocets.
Never the three shall meet
The moral of the story? You can't trust the system!
No joke I fucking hate escalators. Regular stairs are best and if not, take an elevator.
Escalators have a way higher throughput than elevators though
Sounds like something from a 90s family comedy. Feel better soon. 
Thanks comrade. The percs are definitely helping
This would have been fine EXCEPT my kid doesn't like to get on an escalator by himself.
Smart kid.
Never get on a small plane. Never get on a helicopter. Never go on an escalator by yourself without a battle buddy.
Why would communism do this?
Hope you feel better soon, comrade
Where did you get the CCTV footage of the incident??
That sucks. Sounds like your kid is around four?
A little older, but he's a bit anxious about certain things
Escalators definitely can cause anxiety and a surprising number of adults don't know how to use them safely. I always stand at least four steps behind people on the up escalator because the number of people that will step off the escalator and just stop while they decide which direction to pick next is shocking.
I think that if you pick a fun place to visit and then do escalator drills, the same way that we teach kids to cross roads safely, then it might help with the anxiety. Also it's something that will hopefully pass on generationally.
escalator drills
the Stackable Crayon of power tools
I watched videos of deadly escalator incidents as a kid on the internet and I won’t go anywhere near them both then and now as I’ve done more research on them as an adult. That kid is right to be anxious about these in my opinion.
They typically don’t have any sort of automatic cutoff because the way they operate is a fixed speed at variable loads. So if a foreign object gets sucked into the machinery it will pass that foreign object through without a hiccup. The guards in place to prevent the intrusion of foreign objects are inadequate and the addition of a manual emergency cutoff is not adequate either.
The foam type of shoes, like crocs or those foam soled Nike’s for example, are very easy to get caught in the machinery when, for instance, you try and “polish” your shoes against the brushes on the side. Typically children wear those shoes, typically children don’t have the foresight to think that’s a bad idea, and the data shows that typically it’s children involved in fatal escalator incidents. It’s a bad design, ban escalators, turn them all into stairs.
These problems get worse when escalators are not properly maintained, and it’s expensive to maintain escalators properly. They will only get more unsafe with time as the metaphorical copper continues getting ripped out of the walls of our economy and maintenance budgets collapse.
While this is true, the actual risk in terms of incidents per escalator journey taken are miniscule. The risk of being seriously injured in an escalator incident is similar to that of being struck by lightning, which is not, for most people, a daily concern.
I got a croc caught in the side of an escalator as a kid. Fortunately it just yanked the shoe off my foot, mangled it, and spit it out at the top.
I don't like escalators anymore.
That was my worst nightmare, I'm glad all you lost was a shoe. 
Death to America!
Oh fuck that's awful
ow
loony tunes ahh
nuke america 
Sounds like you defeated the curse from Final Destination well done
Your kid being anxious if elevators reminds me of how I developed a really bad anxiety of electric fences when I was a teenager. Not ideal when I live in the countryside and have to cross and open electric fences to walk my dog, so whenever I was walking without anyone else, I would get on my belly and scotch on the ground under the fence (which were usually like three feet above ground, I could have just ducked).
So what you're saying is
This pastry just cost me $78 at Newark Airport.
This is why Americans think the economy is terrible.
Did your wife laugh at you or
I was bleeding quite a bit so she was more concerned
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