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this post was submitted on 21 Jul 2023
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Hunted by cows.
Elaborate.
Out on a run, herd of heifers. Thought I could move them from a path they were blocking by making a loud noise, turns out that's an extremely bad idea. There was a matriarch cow which took the lead and while they didn't charge, this was mostly because I kept an obstacle between us at all times.
They were extremely persistent. At one point we were doing the full Benny Hill routine around a tiny shrub either of us could easily have walked through. In the end I had to jump in a river to escape. I've learned my lesson, cows are extremely dangerous and apparently kill loads of people every year.