"Can you confirm they're having sex?"

"From what I can tell."

"I didn't ask if you can 'tell' they're having sex, I asked if you can CONFIRM sex. Are we two men standing in a swamp watching two gators maybe hump, or are we goddamn SCIENTISTS looking to understand the nature of sexuality as presented in the wild? Because I put my Science wellies on this morning, unlike someone who CAN'T CONFIRM TO ME IF THIS IS ALLIGATOR HOMOSEXUALITY OR NOT!"