this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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Ever since COVID took my dad from us in 2023, this is the way all my "nightmares" end up going: No matter what horrific vision unfolds before me, "it is what it is." "This is my life now; better get used to it." "Oh well." "So it goes."
Dream about being dismembered?
"Guess I'll just deal with it."
Dream about the world ending?
"Sure, why not."
Dream about everyone else I love burning alive?
"I see. That figures."
Dream about being trapped in a dark twisting maze that changes every time I turn around, with no exit in sight?
"Uh huh. Alright then."
Dream about experiencing explosive decompression when the hull of an orbital habitat I'm living in ruptures?
"Ok. Whatever."
Dream about my car falling through a hole in a collapsing bridge, landing in the water, sinking to the bottom of the river upside down, the cab gradually flooding with me trapped inside, feeling the freezing, dark, murky water creeping up, immersing my scalp, my forehead, my eyes, my nose, my mouth...
"Yeah. Of course."
Dream about being torn apart and eaten alive by monsters?
"... Finally."
It's funny how things that may happen soon can still fill me with dread when the thought of them actually proceeding leaves me empty and resigned ._.
It is what it is
so i might be misreading this but if you're having a persistent sense of dread, please mention it the next time you see your physician. i'm not trying to practice medicine over the internet, just there's a chance it could be something treatable. this is absolutely not my area of expertise (what little medical expertise i have lies in gastro, i'm a musician) but i have dealt with persistent dread, even through dreams, and it's not fun. it took i think 7 years for me to get over it but it was less time, more personal growth and events that i went through that brought me out of it.
it still comes and goes and i don't think i'll ever not be passively suicidal, but your dreams sound a lot like my intrusive thoughts when my anal retentiveness turned into OCD (thanks for that month, prozac!)
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change.
The courage to change the things I can.
And the wisdom to know the difference.