this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2026
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Science Memes

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[–] Wren@lemmy.today 36 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Shout out to my broken coworker who brought his crystals in to work one day to fix our negative energy. After carefully placing each stone according to universal leylines of good vibes, extraordinarily pleased with himself, immediately saw me slice through a package and into my fingers. I needed eleven stitches.

[–] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Negative energy can never be removed, only transferred. He obviously didn't like you, the skeptic, so he transferred all the negative energy into you from your other co-workers. /s

[–] Wren@lemmy.today 1 points 9 hours ago

Aw, but I supported him. Magic is stupid but I like cool rocks.

[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's just how the magic stones remove the negative energy from your body, through bloodletting

[–] Wren@lemmy.today 16 points 1 day ago

It all makes sense now. The universe balanced my humors.