Hello nerds 
hope you all have a good next week
Remember no crackers
It was pretty funny Kirk got shot
this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2025
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Ethnic Minorities and People of Color
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Official Title of this Community: Ethnic Minorities and People of Color
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Gonna go on a rant about bad therapy time, I'm just going to cw since even I feel content warned thinking of it
spoiler
Been having a rough couple of weeks, worthy of a telenovella, super sick relatives that may die, terrible time at work getting sexually harassed, and existential dread. Add to all that shit my theorycasting of trauma dumping on a brand new therapist out of the gate was a complete disaster, ofc in this area what could I fucking expect, white chud dismisses not only bigotry I experience, also a damn hate crime I experienced the reason I'm going in, my terrible burnout, but also belittles me as the public typically does retail workers, if he didn't read my file, and tbh he probably didn't its a medicaid clinic ffs, but this is almost as bad as the therapist I had that started ranting on me about some random other client that didn't care for her child and called me the wrong name while scolding me, lol. I should have stopped her, but I was morbidly curious, and in this case I sort of wonder how bad he's going to continue fucking up, I'm already about 70pct offended, son that takes WORK. To a large degree I realize in Gringolandia I'm basically a lime colored teapot unicorn, poor fuck has never seen something like me, nor ever will again, so he utterly lacks the framework, and in such a therapeutic environment you're just going to standardize all the patients, RIP me the shiny outlier. I don't want to exactly burn bridges and call him out, but I'm not going to be able to take an ultra patronizing 6th grade tier biology of anxiety lecture without losing my last shred of patience with all the shit going down. I can't exactly ditch neither for reasons, at least not right away.
When its shit like this it becomes to harder to realize how much is me trying to process trauma when I'm still in actively being traumatized survival mode vs an actual new offense. I also have that to consider. I hate having to backseat therapy like this, why couldn't I have gone to gradschool and all that work out? Lol, at least I will never harm someone with my knowledge but myself I suppose.
Also I want to say fuck, talk therapy 50% bourgeois cishet white nonsense other 50% metaphysics! Grrr.
I'm sorry that cracker treated you like that. There's good clinics and therapists out there but it takes effort to find them and it takes extra effort to find them when marginalized and then it takes extra extra effort to find them in places that are full of CHUDs. I hope you can find someone who's actually a good fit because a good therapist can save lives, but a bad therapist is worse than no therapist at all
A mere 12b chatbot was better than this guy, or the lady that started scolding, I feel equal parts amused and angry about that. I hate going back to a modern twist on Dr. Sbaitso, humans are supposed to be better.
I'm fortunate the clinic I go to has a lot of PoC so the staff is at least experienced dealing with racism issues (if not PoC themselves). I do notice that white counselors often have blind spots, even when they're actively trying not to.
I literally used to have a white cis gay male therapist who claimed he was anti-racist and defended his Black friends from racism even when he was just a little kid, and when I talked about microaggressions in the context of workplace and hiring concerns, he legitimately asked me, "How do you know it's racism?"
You can't make this shit up lmao
Had this dude pull that along with not believing me, it honestly retripped my trauma and made it hard to function for a few days. This is going to have me swear off therapy for good at this rate.
This dude has spots you could drive a bus through, hence chud. PoCs are rare out here. Ended up flat out cancelling, I'd rather not deal with a racist.
Hope you find a better therapist. It's hard finding good ones as-is, so adding racism to deal with on top of that is even worse.
Did he have a background in sociology? It's always the goddamn sociology psychologists that are the worst. They devoted their undergraduate to a Marxist field of study without ever reading Marx because the Red Scare never ended.
Yes he did, I'll keep an eye out for those since the dude was pretty fucking bad, finally working courage up to see a therapist about a hate crime for them to be a bigot is some cosmic grade to hell with you in particular, the simulation desires your upmost raw suffering tier shit.
I've had some good therapists before, but they've generally been super seasoned and in cities, and I'm not in a good place physically nor economically for 5hr drives. I'm at the point I'm just going to call it for now since I can't afford being fucked up for 4 days at work to the point people notice because my therapist reopened trauma and salted the mental wounds. I cried like every day after work.
Does your insurance cover telehealth visits? I think it depends on the state, but some places you can call or do video appointments with therapists if you're 5 hours away from a clinic. Maybe you can get a referral from your primary care provider saying you need some kind of accommodation not available at clinics in your town, so you have to use someone elsewhere.
A lot of therapists don't take my insurance at all and where I live a lot of places have gotten more strict on remote visits. I'll try to get a referral for that office again but my first visits will still need to be in person.