Yeah I know who he is. He actually had trouble with women even though he had backstage passes as a writing for rolling stone magazine. It wasn't until after he learned the dating skills that he was able to be better with women.

I'm sure there was some there but it was mostly just guys who had gotten rejected a lot trying to figure out how to be more confident, dress better, and learn how to talk to women. Later on people started to mix politics in with it (i.e. "women are only like this cuz of feminism, liberalism, etc.")

I've been flamed for comments that get widespread support a few weeks later.

Looks like that happened in this very thread lol. I see comments now that basically mirror what I said earlier in the thread's history.

I like the idea of a dating coach.

That's essentially what the PUAs from the 2000s were. It was only towards the end of the 2000s and the early 2010s that you started to see that stuff morph into the "manosphere" and "red pill" stuff you see today.

I mean I guess, but... I hate to use this term, but I think the therapist is only going to give you "blue pill" advice like "be yourself" or other useless platitudes. Unless the therapist has themselves dealt with this and somehow conquered it, I highly doubt a therapist would help.

It really is possible to be attracted to someone and accept that the other person isn't attracted back and still be nonromantic friends. I have done it, and I still have those friendships many years later.

So I think that there needs to be more advice on how to do this, as I've rarely encountered someone who's successfully navigated it as you have. Maybe a separate post on how to do it? But anyways, should people want to pursue that option, I think it's something that the individual needs to assess based on the strength of their feelings. If they are not emotionally ready for this kind of change (and from what I've seen a lot, maybe most, cis-straight men aren't), then I think not seeing the person anymore might be the better option. Otherwise if they really want to try to make a friendship work (and actually try to be friends and not try to "get in" later) then I guess your advice would be helpful.

That one post about how "programming.dev" users are complete dumb dumbs was pretty on point.

Obviously I don't want any weirdo no-fap reactionary shit.

I'm glad you are at least asking this, because fapping too much to porn is definitely not good for you. The problem is, because of the no-fap reddit communities, the knee-jerk response from hexbear will be "there's absolutely no problem at all!" I've noticed that when I go nofap even for a few days is that I feel more energetic. I also get more of an "urge" to try to talk to the opposite sex, instead of just being passive about it. And I think the opposite sex also notices this change in behavior and it comes off as more confident and assertive. For example, you walk around and get smiles, or at least notice the little signs that someone might be into you. Maybe this is sexual interest over-perception bias, but at least that's how I feel. You miss all the shots you never take, right? Lastly, I also appreciate the beauty of the opposite sex more, whereas before someone would have to be "mega hot" for me to pay attention, with nofap I appreciate even "regular" looking people. Maybe that means my mind is getting "desperate," but I'd like to think of it as me appreciating natural beauty instead of the hyper sexualized stuff you see in media.

But either way I think this is a healthy conversation to have

On the one hand, having these guys (le redditors and le lemmylords) in charge of the US military would be funny, because they would just order soldiers into the meat grinder ("don't worry, our superior Xbox controllers will be more than enough against those 'mines' and 'missiles'"), but on the other hand, they're stupid enough to do something really life-threatening to the planet (like casually using nukes).