[-] avirse@feddit.uk 15 points 8 months ago

Having a group is only half the battle, the other half is getting that group together when one person works odd hours, another has chronic illness with lots of medical appointments, and a third has a bitch of a commute during the week so often can't get home in time.

For years we had games every Friday and Sunday, all it takes is a couple of people changing jobs to completely disrupt that setup.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 20 points 1 year ago

Yes, putting an electrical appliance in the bathroom is weirder than putting an appliance that requires both power and plumbing in the room that always has both power and plumbing.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 14 points 1 year ago

I don't even seem to have a special interest. It's like I'm doing autism wrong.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 18 points 1 year ago

No idea whether it's their reason, but anecdotally I've found it has a few benefits. If coordinated properly it's significantly easier to train new(er) staff, it improves cross-organisational understanding to overhear other departments' conversations either at desks or in break rooms, and it stops people becoming isolated pockets of knowledge and culture because they only ever see or interact with the same one or two people.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

My instinctive response is that it's a terrible idea. While having no expectation to mask is great, it seems to me that gathering a group of people who generally struggle to take care of themselves and their environment and who have very low tolerance for certain environmental stimuli and a deep need for other environmental stimuli is a recipe for chaos.

I attend a local autistic adults zoom group every other week, and it's great for support and understanding, but if I had to be in the same room as one of the other members their stims would give me a meltdown. I over-empathise emotionally, an autistic friend has almost no emotional empathy, as a result some of our interactions do not go as intended. Multiply these kinds of issues with having to effectively live with eachother and I just don't see it going well.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 14 points 1 year ago

Given the context of the article, the alternative suggestion isn't "set up your own server" but "use software that doesn't require a server", which sidesteps most of that list.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 27 points 1 year ago

Because the number of people who won't buy it because of the LCD screen is smaller than the number of additional people who will buy it if it's $X cheaper at launch.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 14 points 1 year ago

This is what smartphones are for. Take picture of clothing item. Take picture of clothing item tag. Save pictures in a "clothes" folder that is synced and/or backed up elsewhere and reference them as needed.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 22 points 1 year ago

"Skill regression" is such an awful term. It would be like taking a severe workaholic who is getting stress ulcers, having them develop a proper work-life balance, and calling that "productivity regression".

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 12 points 1 year ago

Honestly I'd be very surprised to see an online autism community with a majority of people professionally diagnosed, even more surprised if the majority were diagnosed as children. Even setting aside how underdiagnosed large sections of the autistic population are, the people who need to seek support and validation that they belong to a community are much more likely to be those who didn't have the right language or support as a child.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 15 points 1 year ago

I'll maybe believe a release date when it's actually announced,. Maybe. Though I already know I'm buying the Switch successor if it's backwards compatible with Switch games, so it would be nice if this article turned out to be true.

[-] avirse@feddit.uk 18 points 1 year ago

This has turned out to be a huge wall of text, sorry.

Most autistic communities recognise that an official diagnosis is hard to get and not always helpful/necessary, so while it's wise not to say as much out in the rest of the world, it's completely valid to self-identify within an autistic space.

Feeling like you're faking the whole thing is so normal. I didn't have a self-identification journey before being diagnosed as an adult, and for the first two years after that diagnosis still felt like I wasn't actually autistic and the assessors made a mistake, or not autistic enough to "count" and give myself accommodation. It comes from a lifetime of learning that your experiences are "wrong", that you "can't trust" your own interpretations of the world around you, that you could do anything a neurotypical person can do if you just try. We late-identified are raised to doubt ourselves. It's often no one's fault, but it still takes a lot of unlearning.

What you do now is start regularly checking in with your senses. Are you feeling tense because you've been ignoring a too-bright light or an irritating noise or an uncomfortable piece of clothing? Removing those kinds of subconscious distractions is a huge relief, whether that's with headphones, earplugs, sunglasses, baseball hats, whatever works. Are you hungry/thirsty/sitting in a really uncomfortable way and haven't realised it? Solve those needs.

Then look into stimming. Physical or mental actions that you feel an urge to do and find calming. They don't have to be "weird" or socially unacceptable - spinning a pen, fiddling with a paperclip, chewing gum, twisting bracelets/wristbands/rings, squeezing a stress ball, wearing clothing that puts pressure in certain places (e.g. I wear dresses with a waist belt for pressure on my abdomen) are all possible stims. Even if it sounds completely unnecessary, try a bunch of thing and see what makes you feel safe and calm.

Chances are that if you're autistic you'll have a lot more mental energy after discovering your sensory sensitivities and stims, because it's not all going into trying to ignore all the discomforts.

The social side is less straightforward, and to be honest I've not figured it out yet. People say masking is damaging and should be avoided at all costs, but those costs can be significant. I've tried to go the route of not masking stims (having found subtle ones that work) and unapologetically wearing sunglasses indoors, but still put on the mask when it comes to communication, tone of voice, facial expressions and the like. Because my aim is to be understood, not to take a stand for all autism-kind, and the relief of meeting my sensory needs frees up a lot of the mental energy for it. Maybe that's the wrong approach, but it's the one that poses the least risk to my comfort.

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submitted 1 year ago by avirse@feddit.uk to c/autism@lemmy.world

I came across this article from 2018 and it really spoke to me as a late-diagnosed autistic only just learning what "comfortable" feels like.

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avirse

joined 1 year ago