I'll be locked up for massacring an army of undead, monkeys, dragons, elementals, and more - all to the thrumming beat of my own heart.

vampirsm

Blasting bad guys and their bosses to bits in my trusty starfighter.

Animal Homicide (Hundreds of cases) and Cockfighting

rape

Poaching various wildlife and crafting dangerous weapons out of thier remains. Also possibly B&E, theft, & manslaughter, depending on what sort of lawyers those bandits have.

Building colourful skyscrapers next to each other in a tiny city grid, until they combine and fly into the sky. I dunno, reverse 9/11?

Being a Bulbasur that saves the world from natural disasters

Trying to escape Hell.

i play gloomstalker rogue with criminal background in bg3, so my list of crimes would be pretty deep.

I genuinely don't know what could be illegal in Outer Wilds, tbh.

monopoly, anti-trust (OpenTTD)

Filling my o2 tanks, taking out the trash, and monitoring a tree’s nutrient levels. With a headless dead guy in the middle of the floor the whole time. Only reporting the dead guy afterwards unless someone walks in on me doing so first.

My normal co-workers will even vouch that I do that kind of thing regularly so it’s not even suspicious. It’s just me being weird.

… I’ll be getting the death sentence for that eventually.

Creating an endless torture mansion (finally got around to Sexy Brutale)

breaking the sound barrier inside of a mountain

As for the actual last game I played, terrorism maybe?

As for the last pc game, I have no idea about what of the countless things that happen there would I be arrested for (it was half life 2)

Battlebit remastered. War crimes.