See, when I fail, it's someone else's fault. When someone else fails, it's their fault.
this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2026
113 points (94.5% liked)
Shitty Ask Lemmy
1704 readers
125 users here now
its like r/shittyaskreddit except its lemmy
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
Nobody wants to work anymore
Oh, you beat me to it. I'll negate mine.
Time to cut back on those avocados!
(Unless, of course, that's what they're farming/trucking)
Farmers are some of the biggest welfare queens in the country.
Yeah around here in the Midwest most of them aren't even growing food. 40% of the corn grown goes to fuel additives, with most of the remainder going to feed lots, and most of what's left over from the mat going into corn syrup. They soybeans are almost all going to cattle feed with a fair bit being used for industrial purposes. And what do you know, those while business models are completely reliant on federal subsidies to work.
Start yanking the ol bootstraps!
They are a bunch of freeloaders looking for a bailout.
Have you tried thoughts and prayers?
They expect the government to bail them out.
Maybe they could try one less avocado toast and $10 coffee?
Special snowflakes all in their feels
Why bother doing all that when you can just blame brown people?
[serious]
At this point that would require them to admit that brown people from Iran are winning at a war
that these people's leader proudly started, which means you can't even blame brown people of cheating.
[/serious]
did they even said "thank you"~?
Not at all.
And to think that I have a job offer for data entry work for them,
full time for 0.8 times the minimum wage,
and none of them were disciplined enough
to just swing around to visit my office.
These people are too lazy to even look around.
All the while I've done so much to attract new workers.
I even hung up balloons in front of my building.
Can you imagine?
Mind you, to apply for a minimum wage job at my company the applicant has to fill out several forms and then submit the exact same information as a PDF file along with a cover letter that will be run through an LLM detector (data mismatches or possibly LLM-written cover letters will be an instant fail) followed by an LLM that determines whether the applicant is worth my HR department's time. If they pass they will have three video interviews, the first of which will be with my company's AI avatar.
If they pass those and do well on a little take-home test that just happens to be identical to the work they'll be doing for me, they're invited to an unpaid six-month full-time WorkPrenticeship™ where they get the opportunity to prove they can consistently perform well beyond the limits of their job description. They don't even have to pay for that privilege, which goes to show that my company likes to go that extra mile for our employees. If they do that and we don't happen to have a silent hiring freeze they get to sign the hiring contract, an industry-wide non-compete agreement, and a contract stating that they will never join a union and will actively report any instance of union building to management.
From then on they get to enjoy all the perks my company has to offer to non-executive workers such as coming to a beautiful office building every day, a salary competitive with other entry-level jobs like the hospitality industry, up to five (5) vacation or sick days, and the chance to work with exciting new artificial intelligence tools that may soon render entry-level drudge work obsolete.
~~No one wants to work anymore.~~
DontRedditMyLemmy beat me to it.
No wonder Kansas farmers are yk
It's Biden's fault.