The amount of Bible verses with Jesus absolutely condemning the rich and the wealthy is overwhelming. And it's not like "oh that's open to interpretation". He's very clear in saying that rich people won't go to heaven. He's very clear in what to do with your money (help the poor and sinners).

His entire message is about "living as he lived". It's amazing how much Christians in America have been able to completely remove all of those aspects by just saying "well, Jesus did that so we don't have to. He died living a selfless life. All we have to do is 'believe the story'".

It has to be the laziest, most American interpretation of a religion ever. It's just fucking embarrassing to me though. Like, Im not Christian, but even I am embarrassed by most American Christians.

There are exceptions. But, most Americans use their Christianity as a shield for being shit people. Their religion isn't even Christianity, it's capitalism, and worship of wealth. The Christians that go to church every week are much more interested in hearing their pastor talk about how Trump is enacting gods plan. They know talking points for why Trump's not a pedophile, why Musk is a genius, or why trans kids in sports are destroying the economy. They couldn't tell you what Jesus said about where Christians should "store their riches". They'd probably say "a bank or a safe".

Jesus would upload to BitTorrent, just like how he multiplied bread and fish.

You say that as if liking copyleft isn't leftist.

Jesus believes in the "free beer" kind of free software

He literally mass produced food for a crowd and gave it away for free. Fucking conservatives haven't read their own manual, they just memorize some parts they like.

Scholars have long been mystified by what Jesus (who famously did not leave any autobiographical writings) was writing on the ground with his finger in John 8:6. Turns out it was early code for an open-source network based storage option.

Arch Linuxxx !!!

he wouldn't have been an American-style MAGA conservative, that's for sure. "Let thy government abduct thy neighbors because they don't have paperwork" is hard to imagine him saying...

By modern contexts Christ was a leader in a workers rebellion against colonial rule, who imbued it with a spiritual angle so profound that it very arguably destroyed or completely reformed the colonizer centuries after his execution.

And FOSS is overtly a leftist paradigm and way of thinking.

Yeah Jesus would have probably digged FOSS but what the heyo is this meme setup. You're just trolling with this.

How in the world could people interpret him as being conservative?!

Actual Jesus if he were here today.

Yeah I don't know what to tell you, the last guy fucked up. Those crossmembers are structural and not up to code. We are going to have to completely tear out the old stuff and replace it with a new frame. And with the price of lumber these days, it's going to set you back a bit. Not to worry though, I've been a carpenter my whole life and people say I perform miracles. So we'll get you up to code in no time flat. Also please check my Etsy store, I do furniture in my off time and have one piece with this cross motif that would really tie this room together.

He converts C into Rust which is also 200% more efficient

The problem is, being omnipotent, he has intimate knowledge of every commercial product that has and will ever exist, so he automatically loses any lawsuit

So, the third option changes the subject? Lol, what a joke.

He would've been an alcoholic. Imagine reading the news today and being able to turn water into wine

Jesus was a man who travelled through the land.

A hard working man and brave.

He said to the rich, "Give your goods to the poor."

And they laid Jesus Christ in his grave.

I disagree. Jesús would say: I like elotes. You want some elotes? Food tastes better when you share it.

Jesus was all about becoming ungovernable. He said to stop using money and avoid storehouses so the tax man will have nothing to easily take. To let go of the temples and leaders so they cannot be used as tools of control. To use the laws of the oppressor against them

I don't think Jesus would be generally pro FOSS, because it's primarily funded by and taken advantage of by corporations. He was a revolutionary, he'd probably be going around helping people live outside the system

He'd also be commie

He'd be in prison for insulting religious beliefs.