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Say you were a guardian or parent and get to decide when a child can get a phone or use a computer and get internet with it. If you wish you can also install software and change router settings to what you see fit.
Some parents decide to forbid the internet completely, others are more relaxed. Some go the helicopter route, and some do not care whatsoever what their kid does online.
What is your policy on letting a child use the internet?
I wouldn't allow them to have a phone at all until they're around 12 to 14 (just like my parents). When it comes to the internet on a computer, the same thing would apply, but they can when supervised. If possible, their only web browser on their internet device will have uBlock Origin installed with custom block lists to prevent them from accessing websites they aren't supposed to. I would also like software (whether I'd have to program it if it doesn't exist or not) to prevent them from using their devices at bedtime. Not a father, but those are the basics of what I'd imagine I do. Expect one last thing: Roblox is completely out of the question. I don't care how much they beg. It's a predator nightmare so it would be completely banned
As someone whose parents attempted to deny technology, this is an excellent way to make sure that your kid has a secret life that you know nothing about, can't influence at all, and you'll be the last person they come for help to if needed.
This is unfortunately true. Despite having an IT admin as a dad, it only taught me how to more effectively circumvent censorship. I went as far as using the 3DS browser to access stuff I wasn't supposed to
Mine were more hardware-oriented, so I had to learn soldering early on to get replacements for all the cables they were withholding (terrible firehazard now that I remember it), but there was no opportunity for me to learn safety when it came to online, and boy was I close from falling into some unpleasant rabitholes.
Education education education.
Explain how the internet works. Explain companies. Explain evil intent and malicious behavior.
Imo, if you put your child under surveillance that's not the right way. If bad things happen despite good education, fine, introduce limits and guardrails.
Don't do things you wouldn't want for yourself. Be consistent.
Basically, do good parenting.
As much as I hate the idea of exposing kids to the ideologies and mass propaganda of the internet, I hate the idea of incompetent adults even more. Plus, exposure builds resistance to some extent. How are they gonna learn to think for themselves if they haven't seen a wide range of views? Also, do you want your child to fail out of college the first time they play a video game? Or only start learning to code in their twenties? if ever since they won't think of a computer that way.
No way, if I was gonna have a brat, the little bastard would be damn competent at everything.
When they figure it out and become capable of reading and writing. Tablets, phones and computers are not locked down. Parental guidening and open communication means they know what it is, that there's good and there's bad content and people etc.
Working great.
/Swedish
I like this
No access until teenagers. If it was like when I was a kid probably younger but it's so fucked rn
You couldn't stop them if you tried, which instead will result on them using dodgy methods to access it, which puts them at even higher risk than if you gave them unrestricted access.
Teach them, teach them that the internet is both fucking terrifying and fucking terrific
Yeah, deliberately view the pain Olympics and one man one jar with them.
Give them the trauma they were looking for.
Mostly the former.
What's so terrifying about Lemmy?
A friend had an excellent (but evil) one.
His son had found some more... interesting areas of the internet (aka porn). He collected a selection of his browsing history and sat him down. They then went, video by video, having an open and honest discussion about it. Dad had FAR more tolerance for mortifying embarrassment than his son did. He learnt to clear the history at least.
The 2nd discussion, 6 months later, used the router logs instead.
I'm not sure I would use this particular method. However, it was apparently highly effective at making his kids think things through (for better or for worse!).
kid needs a vpn
this is good because it teaches the kid the importance of privacy and the entire lack thereof online.
it's also nice to not freak out at porn viewing and to teach them it's ok in moderation.
Start educating them on what internet is and how it works early, before they even get to use it. Allow them to observe how you use it. Explain the good and the bad it can provide. I feel like a lot of how you should use the internet is just how you should generally live your life - stranger = danger, don't give your personal information to anyone at all (even if they claim to be me/my friend/police/whatever), understand how content engagement works and who benefits from it (ads and manipulation are everywhere, not just online), and so on. Ngl I'm kinda baffled how we navigated a much more dangerous real world "just fine" up until the internet has apparently become some unfathomable evil. By not allowing your kids to learn early, you are just gimping their future, they will have to go up against people who often literally don't know a life without the digital world. Not to mention - if you don't teach them the basics of understanding how to navigate the world and its dangers, they can get hurt whether the internet still even exists.
My one opinion that might be controversial is that I believe that by enforcing arbitrary blocklists (outside of just generally useful stuff like uBlock Origin) and restricting content without explaining and demonstrating anything you are simply conditioning your kids to be ok with surveillance and censorship.
Our policy was supervised / filtered only until early teens. Kids sites, educational stuff, games we purchased and approved of, etc. We were also late to give them phones, our son got his first because in his freshman year of high-school his band teacher set up a boiler-room to sell worlds finest chocolate and he was the only kid who didn't have a cell phone.
When we had "the talk" we discussed masturbation and porn, why porn is popular, and all the negatives that go with it without condemning it outright. We talked about online predators and not sharing things with people you didn't know, especially pics, addresses, etc.
My wife and I are firm believers that kids need space to discover who they are, so as they became teens, things went to semi-supervised. We paid attention to them more than their devices, but we had rules such as adding one of our emails as a recovery address to any socials they set up, so we could check up on them if we thought something bad was going down. Never had to use that, and I think just having it there made them think about what they did online.
Around sixteen/seventeen, no filter and no more backdoors into their accounts. Just a couple of long heart to hearts about how shitty things can be on the internet and how we're there to talk with no judgement if they need us.
You sit at a desktop in the kitchen to use the computer. If you have shown yourself to be responsible you know your password.
The wifi shuts off at bedtime.
My 11-12-13 year old kids have Apple Watches for communication purposes but no smartphones. These are charged all together in a locked pantry at night.
Access to the Internet is not something that the parents are actually capable of restricting. As soon as one kid in the has a phone, their entire peer group is exposed.
The question isn't about restriction. It's about who will be teaching these kids about the Internet. The first kid learns from their parents; every other kid learns (mostly) from other kids.
If your kid is the last in their class to have a phone, everything they know about the Internet they will have learned from their peers. They sure as hell aren't going to tell you they already know about all the things you've been trying to hide from them.
Block every site except itch.io until they turn 13, so as to recreate my childhood on addictinggames.com
🎵The internet is for porn🎶
And not at all for kids. No internet at all until like, 13. And then, with all the safety barriers possible. Before that age, maybe some online gaming (not roblox, just Minecraft) with friends.
Computers don't need the internet to be an enriching tool. Anyone remember reader rabbit? Encarta? The maze game? Time riders? Oregon trail? Age of empires? I learned so much using offline software.
Our kid is three now, and the Finnish whatever children's organisation says that no screens at that age, except for stuff like video-calling family or so. Hence, no internet as well for him.
ublock origin, no ads, only libretube or freetube
FOSS
My daughter is 7 and no unsupervised internet, at most some YouTube videos. She gets tablet time but its just educational games and videos, mostly Khan Academy and PBS content.
Furthermore my wife is working with all the other moms to build a pact to keep our kids cellphone free as long as possible. Soon as one friend gets one they all want one.
Fuck that, kids shouldn't be on the Internet unsupervised. No access when they're little and restricted access until they're an adult or close it it.
crontab, it's enough to :
and it's pretty straighforward to configure, e.g.
* 8-17 * * 1-5 killall SlayTheSpire && date >> ~/shame
# prevents from playing during weekday working hours
or for accumulation (which can be reset daily, weekly, etc by simply deleting the minutes file)
pgrep mpv && >> mpv_minutes; if [ $(wc -l mpv_minutes) -gt 1000 ]; then echo beyond threshold; fi
That works also for turning up/down network interfaces.
PS: I use this on myself. I'm not a child but I don't have perfect self control. It works.
Limited time and very limited access to content, only content that is age appropriate.
Use the device’s parental controls to limit apps, downloading, purchases, sites, hours available and total time allowed. Doesn’t matter if it’s a phone, tablet, or PC. LAN parental controls if available as a secondary layer of site blocking and overall internet blocking at internet curfew time.
Been doing this for years. It’s a must. Parents are responsible for limits on mobile devices and content. Having the software do the limits is far, far easier than physically demanding the phone from the kid, shutting it off, or looking over their shoulder to see what they’re using it for.
Only with my eyeballs in presence. My son is autistic and barely verbal. He also has combination ADHD. I wish I could forbid the tablet entirely but it just doesn't work with a child facing these challenges. For example, he can't sit still through dinner so if we go out, he uses tablet until the food comes. He's obsessed with Legos. All the content he watches is Lego builds. He watches that on YouTube kids with me present to make sure he doesn't slip through the cracks. My eldest is 19 now and we let him access the internet unabated, that was a huge mistake I highly recommend people know exactly what their kids are watching and you should restrict traffic to safe content only.
Kids forbidden, Internet OK
I'd wait until they're older, 7-8 years of age at least. Then I'd make sure they learn how it functions in some capacity and not just operating it mindlessly.
No social media at all. Heavily curated Youtube, and honestly at the end of the day I'd rather them play outside under supervision than spend all day online. The internet as it is does not go well with developing minds.
I have an 11 year old son. He has neutered Internet that can do normal searches on. An hour budget a day for games. An hour for YouTube. Other than that he can talk to his friends on Discord or text. I check his Discord every now and then. He only talks to his buddies or my gaming buddies.