this post was submitted on 05 May 2026
442 points (99.6% liked)

Microblog Memes

11489 readers
393 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

RULES:

  1. Your post must be a screen capture of a microblog-type post that includes the UI of the site it came from, preferably also including the avatar and username of the original poster. Including relevant comments made to the original post is encouraged.
  2. Your post, included comments, or your title/comment should include some kind of commentary or remark on the subject of the screen capture. Your title must include at least one word relevant to your post.
  3. You are encouraged to provide a link back to the source of your screen capture in the body of your post.
  4. Current politics and news are allowed, but discouraged. There MUST be some kind of human commentary/reaction included (either by the original poster or you). Just news articles or headlines will be deleted.
  5. Doctored posts/images and AI are allowed, but discouraged. You MUST indicate this in your post (even if you didn't originally know). If an image is found to be fabricated or edited in any way and it is not properly labeled, it will be deleted.
  6. Absolutely no NSFL content.
  7. Be nice. Don't take anything personally. Take political debates to the appropriate communities. Take personal disagreements & arguments to private messages.
  8. No advertising, brand promotion, or guerrilla marketing.

RELATED COMMUNITIES:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Put down the cudgel and reach for the olive branch

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] thethrilloftime69@feddit.online 116 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (6 children)

I don't get texts like this. Am I doing something wrong?

Edit: Thank you all for your unkind comments.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 94 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

FUCK YOU, MORON

(Is that better?)

[–] i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca 60 points 1 week ago (1 children)

DO YOU EVEN WHITEN YOUR TEETH?

Ah fuck I did it wrong.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 25 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I FUCKING DIG UR STYLE HOMES

... Dammit

[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

YOU HAVE NICE FACIAL HAIR!

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

THANK YOU IT'S A LOT OF WORK SO FIRST I TRIM THE SIDES SEE

[–] CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

GOD DAMNIT YOU GUYS ARE SO WHOLESOME AND MAKE ME WANT TO NOT DESTROY HUMANITY!

[–] MrShankles@reddthat.com 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

FUCKING AROOOOOOO BROTHER!!!

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

ALL THESE COMMENTS ABOUT SELF LOVE HAVE ME CRANKING MY HOG!!!

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 7 points 1 week ago (3 children)

It's "Holmes", latino gangbangers are super into Arthur Conan Doyle and shit.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] OrganicMustard@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago (1 children)

u have a really nice cock

what do u use to trim it like that

(am I doing it correctly?)

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

A special type of pedo-adjacent rabbi did it for me! Well, to me. I was too young to understand the task at hand.

[–] Clent@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 week ago

Shut the fuck up and go back to where ever u came from then pussy.

SpoilerYou're welcome

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

I think you have to be terminally online in the Twitter way, not the Lemmy way

[–] bigkahuna1986@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 week ago

Go to a Linux community and have an opinion on literally anything.

[–] bonenode@piefed.social 5 points 1 week ago

I think not?

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 2 points 1 week ago

Probably yes. Be more assertive. Stand up for something. Insult people. FUCKING LIVE YOU WOBBLY HALF ZOMBIE!

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 69 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Men so starve to compliments that they turn instant friends when you tell them that the generic black shirt they wearing fit them really good.

[–] orenj@leminal.space 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

...Is this tech? I should be nicer

[–] quips@slrpnk.net 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But give real compliments, don’t say something you don’t mean

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago

The compliment I got from someone that said she thought my dimples were cute has been giving me strength for the past decade.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 54 points 1 week ago
[–] lokalhorst@feddit.org 48 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] egrets@lemmy.world 49 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] kungen@feddit.nu 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Activated charcoal isn't good for your enamel or mouth health in general, so I hope he has found a better way.

[–] turtlesareneat@piefed.ca 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Gen Z tip: Chewing small gravel can strengthen your teeth, like lifting weights does for muscles

[–] python@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Time really is a flat circle, Gastroliths have been in vogue before

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 7 points 1 week ago

Transcript:
Person A: looks like a small paragraph.
Person B: One sentence.
Person B: another sentence

Well, we can (not) see where this is going

[–] RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip 44 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wish I could do this but I don't have any haters everyone loves me.

[–] kinkles@sh.itjust.works 63 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org 31 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] naught101@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Vex_Detrause@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 week ago

throws dentures at your feet

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I quite enjoy the amount of space between your eyebrows and chin.

[–] joker54@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It was a house fire. They won't grow back. Like my family.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 31 points 1 week ago (2 children)

"i like your facial hair"

bro got very cozy very quickly

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

I still remember the one time someone said I have a great moustache

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What social media is selling are dopamine hits. Putting out hate and getting people worked up scores you a small dopamine hit. Getting an honest sounding compliment and having a stranger show interest and appreciation in something you are secretly very proud of, gets you an instant massive dopamine hit, followed by more little hits every time you remember the compliment.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Putting out hate and getting people worked up scores you a small dopamine hit.

It's a tough cycle to break out of if you find yourself in it.

[–] ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

So true. In a related tangent, without this, Fox News would have only ever been another shitty cable channel. I've been forced to watch it a few times by virtue of being in a place I couldn't leave, and it's full of this shit: words or pictures provoking anger, anger, anger, praise, fear, anger, anger, etc.

It's no wonder the watchers of it can't get off it: the world must feel very empty if you've been on a careening subliminal emotional rollercoaster of media intake for however long.

[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Let me try...

"You have a pretty mouth"

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago

Fuck you and stfu.
And get your cock out and fuck my mouth if you like it so much...but don't touch my hair or so help me!!!

Also, I'm not gay.

Bring lube, just in case.

I'M NOT GAY!

[–] navigator@piefed.zip 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I don’t get hate DM’s but I do get an occasional message saying good things about my music when I post something. Then it turns out to be a scammer or someone offering whatever social media marketing scheme (which is probably a scam too).

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 4 points 1 week ago

How long until they get to the gay sex?

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 4 points 1 week ago

It is so easy manipulating idiots. The best part is manipulating others for good, not to gain leverage, but manipulate for the benefit of all, greater good like.

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 week ago

I'll never understand how people can feel better about themselves by being intentionally hurtful, but then again, I would 100% apologize to chatgpt so I guess that tracks.

[–] Eat_Your_Paisley@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

You did great but I'll keep my cudgel

load more comments
view more: next ›