Mom is stoned.
this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2026
589 points (98.0% liked)
Funny: Home of the Haha
9245 readers
7 users here now
Welcome to /c/funny, a place for all your humorous and amusing content.
Looking for mods! Send an application to Stamets!
Our Rules:
-
Keep it civil. We're all people here. Be respectful to one another.
-
No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.
-
Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.
Other Communities:
-
/c/TenForward@lemmy.world - Star Trek chat, memes and shitposts
-
/c/Memes@lemmy.world - General memes
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
An overdue existential crisis, or moment of clarity, caused by a lifetime of routine alienation between the consumer, the product, the store, the factory pen and butchery.
Mom should read Marx, and The Jungle.
Maybe pick up hunting, if she wants to see what it takes from her own pov.
+1 to the existential exploration.
A little more lot and she'll eventually stumble in to "Where did this existence come from? Why is there matter to have a universe, why is there any existence at all? If God exists, how was he created?"
load more comments
(10 replies)
Food is fucking weird
I'm pretty weirded out by everyone in this thread saying Mom is high as fuck or having a mental break because this feels like a pretty normal series of thoughts to me, and not like something that would be distressing or brought on by distress.
It was for me too. That’s why I opt for the tofu now.
You're just casually slogging through dissociative existentialism on a regular basis?
load more comments
(3 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Mom is beginning to see through her cultural conditioning to things that the owner class meant to be invisible. Mom is made of meat and the flesh on her table was once an individual like her, maybe even a mom like her, and Mom let herself become complicit in a system that makes one victim the victim of another victim all for the enrichment of the cruel and hateful creatures with economic power.
This goes back way further than ownership. We’re talking millions of years. Dinosaurs feasting on dinosaurs. We’re a little speck of dust on a speck of dust in the blink of an eye to the vast, uncaring universe.
load more comments
(3 replies)
That’s because it is poetry. Mom might need a psych eval, but it’s still poetry (and I love it).
// I cooked a steak tonight
// and was feeling alien
//
// How weird this gross piece
// of cold raw flesh
// on a cold plate is
//
// and I was thinking
// I am just an animal
// with the luxury of packaged flesh
// and is it human flesh?
// Like
// I wouldn't know
// We just believe it's a cow but
//
// we don't
//
// have fucking proof
//
// of anything
//
//
// The knife went through the same
//
// as if it was my own leg
//
// -Mom
load more comments
(7 replies)
Sounds like mom just took a hit of some gooooood shit.
Is this your mum?
From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine. Your kind cling to your flesh, as though it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call a temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal… Even in death I serve the Omnissiah.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Don’t you go aristotling on me
Someone got into the edibles lol
that lady is dissociating. get her some therapy.
Fuck that, get her elected
Deep Thoughts by Werner Herzog.
Is your mom channeling Phillip K Dick?
OP's mom definitely has a lot of dick in her, if that's what you're asking.
I place the rotisserie chicken onto the cutting board and grab one wing firmly, then with a practiced hand, twist and dislocate the wing from its shoulder. I pause for a moment to look at the joints in my own fingers, then continue to dismember the rest of the chicken with my bare hands.
Where funny
I find the juxtaposition of the innocuous lead in ("text from my mom") with the rather unhinged text funny. The comparison to poetry, which I personally associate with peacefulness, adds to the expectation that it's going to be a pleasant text, which gets subverted spectacularly. I can also imagine the mom's encounter with the steak, resulting in them drafting the text to their child, which makes me chuckle because it's such a silly thing to experience.
It's less explicitly funny than a lot of things, but the subtlety doesn't mean it isn't funny. Humor is subjective and all, but there's plenty of funny to be found here for most people.
This is exactly why I voted for Trump to dismantle the EPA and FDA.
If we can’t know anyway there’s no sense in wasting money on trying.
/s
I mean, has she tried her leg?
OPs mom definitely got high as hell before eating her steak.
Mom accidentally dropped an existential poem in the group chat and then probably went back to doing dishes.
omnivore realises the cognitive dissonance required to consume meat :P
I don't think anything should suffer unnecessarily (so most of the meat industry is of course terrible), but anything without sapience, and doesn't have a sense of self or concept of time isn't much different to plants to my mind. I don't think there's any cognitive dissonance inherent in eating meat in general.
You probably also wouldn't appreciate my stance on how little I care about a human infant's life.
I personally draw the line at ability to be in pain/suffering, rather than self-awareness. And so trying to minimise the suffering I cause to other beings, within practical limits - living in a capitalist society, everything I buy or use was at least partially made available by human exploitation.
But back to animals, I do agree that, say, a prawn is most likely capable of less suffering, than say, a cow or chicken, since their nervous system and "psychology" (if a prawn even has such) is much simpler. So if someone was truly forced to eat animal protein for health reasons (with the assumption that human health is of elevated priority over animal suffering), then I do think that eating animals of lower ability for suffering is more ethical than those with higher. Both prawns and cows can feel bodily pain, but animals with higher cognitive abilities are probably also harmed by all the ways in which factory farming stops them from being able to express their natural behaviours.
I am of mixed attitudes towards treating animals and humans on the same priority scale. My emotional affection to people I know and my awareness of societal norms tend to make me shy away from saying that a fetus/newborn or a person with profound intellectual disability are potentially less capable of non-pain suffering than a cow or a dog, but intellectually it would only be consistent reasoning. (Same with drawing parallels between human slavery and animal captivity and exploitation.)
load more comments
(6 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Mom got woke
Mom, did you find my shroom stash and how much did you take?
Mom tried the edibles.
view more: next ›