The thing we were parodying actually exists again? Both Zapp Hegseth and Zapp Brannigan were drawn from the same material? It's honestly so perfect it seems like it had to be planned.
Zapp Hegseth it is.
this post was submitted on 13 Mar 2026
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But with less charm.
Or valour .
Or valor, or velour.
valour
is a man of valor.
Barely even a fog
More sadism and white supremacy
And intelligence
Hegseth has charm? I just assumed he was yet another nepo baby hire.
(I think they are suggesting it is Hegseth that has less charm than Brannigan)
Zapp does. Keggerbreath doesn't.
Brannigan is more of a gentleman.
"We couldn't imagine Iran would close Hormuz"
Yeah... I'm still trying to imagine if Branningan could be that stupid.
Watching any episode with Brannigan in it will cure you of that delusion, because he absolutely would be stupid enough. A perfect fit for the Trump administration, as it were.
I sent waves after waves of my own men at them
This point begs the question, who is Kif?
We wish we had a Kif.
The average public does not hear about the Kifs, they are too busy having to be productive to compensate.
Real life Kif? Rubio - spineless , traitor, blends into the background.
Kif isn't a traitor though. Sure he's cowardly and basically useless, but he's got a good heart.
Zap has destroyed multiple planets and sacrificed his men while Kif just watches. They blew up the DOOP headquarters and attacked the Neutral planet. Tell my wife I said "Hello."
"Sir, I don't think that's wise."
"Kif, if there's one thing I don't need, it's your 'I don't think that's wise' attitude"
"What shall I do with your Jergens Sir?"
"Squirt it on some homeless man with dry elbows."
Hegseth is the human equivalent of gas station boner pills and that's a hill I'll kill on.
Shout out to when it was funny that he was reading trump quotes and not just terribly sad.
This really highlights how much smarter Zapp is than Trump.
Zapp took advantage of Leela's moment of weakness, since a moment is all it takes with the zapper.
Whereas hegseth paid a woman 50k to shut up about the time he raped her.
So that's a difference.
"Shaheds have a pre-programmed kill limit."
“What makes a man turn neutral? A lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?”