Autism

Fireworks are a tough one. Ear plugs or some aggressive noise cancelling headphones are about it, because people loooove their boom pops. I had to go to an NFL game recently and my AirPod Pros were a lifesaver.

For entertaining, I've just started asserting myself (excrutiating, but the brief social embarrassment is worth the longer stress of dealing with the circus). It's honestly easier these days because a) I'm older and starting to realise most people I hang out with will take it in stride and b) I am lucky to have extremely low pressure family and friends. So this might not work for you but I hope it might.

If you can't be 100% honest, tell people you get stressed easily - they usually understand that. Or if they're selfish, that you have a migraine (which I would get from the anxiety of an upcoming event, so not necessarily a lie for me). Migraines have a similar look & feel and if you prime them to accept that you have one, they are more likely to roll with it if you need to disappear and decompress for a while.

I also like the other poster's suggestion of helping prepare food or clean up. It gives you something to focus on and takes you out of the main event. People will appreciate not having to do the work themselves so they can enjoy the party. It's a win-win.

Finally, if you need a shield, offer to take photos. It's not glamorous, but personally I am far more comfortable staying to the sidelines and hiding behind the camera. Just remember to follow through and upload the best photos to a cloud drive to share with everyone.

Idunno it's just a number going up.

I prefer to see my new year as only really starting first day of spring, like the gods intended. I refuse to abide by silly Roman emperors and their ideas.

Me and my partner is just staying at home to chill and sleep

Based on your comments it sounds like you might live with people who want participation? Can you give more details about what the parties usually entail? That might make it easier to brainstorm strategies that are directly applicable to you.

Some general big party thoughts:

• are you able to volunteer to take on some of the prep or cleanup duties? Without realizing it fully, I've always volunteered to help "clean up" (even at public events lol) as a way to have something to do. I love tasks lol. It also generally means being able to be in a quieter place for a while. Oh no, I missed the fireworks?? Sorry, I was busy with the dishes 🤷‍♀️

• earplugs seem like something you might have thought about already but I'll mention just in case?

• ensuring you have comfortable clothing on, regulating your temperature etc.

• ensuring you have safe snacks or have eaten beforehand in case the food is not appealing to you. It would be bad to be enduring this while hungry.

• keeping a water bottle with you to stay hydrated and/or having a strategy to avoid being pressured to drink if that is a concern. At public events I order something like soda water or cranberry juice in a rocks glass even if I don't want anything to drink and people generally mind their own business. Some people seem to take an empty glass or lack of glass as a crisis.

New years has always been a low key thing in my family. We would have dinner together, then watch movies or something and then put on the CBC countdown. I don't recall ever going out with friends either - maybe spent it at one of their homes but no big parties. Even when I was younger and didn't fully realize how stressful I found big events I knew that I had no interest in being on crowded public transit after either spending stupid amounts of money on a ticket to a party or standing outside at the city's free festivities. While my parents like parties, I feel lucky that New Years wasn't an event where we were dragged to any. Fireworks were never a big issue as far as I recall. I've always at least heard some going off (including now when I live in the country!) but never close enough that they were distressing.

As an adult living on my own or with my partner we eventually gave ourselves permission to not celebrate. No pressure to go anywhere, stay up until midnight, reply to people who text at midnight etc. We still end up with something very similar to what I described with my family. Sometimes preparing the meal is stressful because we usually try out a cuisine that is new to us but I know I always have the opportunity to opt out if I have to. This year we didn't do that because I didn't think I could handle the mental load but we did still have a somewhat elaborate meal of hotpot

I dont see much difference between getting into a new year and getting into the next day. "New year" is a made up, arbitrary thing.

i don’t go to new year’s parties

Two ways: we either travel to an island with my brother and his partner (who's also autistic). On this island fireworks are banned pretty much everywhere and we spend the evening like every other night of the year.

Or we stay home and spend the evening like every other night of the year but I'm wearing earplugs and noise cancelling headphones.

Yes, we get asked to celebrate with other people but we decided it's just not worth it a couple years ago.

I wake up and try to remind myself to not write/type the old year anymore — unless I'm referring to something that happened last year.

Ooh, an autism community. Subbed (pending, it says). I'm high functioning but still on the spectrum. Just not entirely sure where. For some reason I thought this was an Ask Lemmy question. Either way, same answer.

I do have to do some shopping later, but I mostly mitigate that with AirPods. Even when they aren't on, people treat me like they are. I can also enable this accessibility thing I found called "Live Listen" that amplifies everything around me. (Your iPhone mic can hear way more than you think it can! This is worth playing with just to understand how much a smartphone, any of them, can actually hear.) I don't use it much because it gives me a headache, but sometimes I turn it on just to have that total immersion in the sounds around me, so I don't have to look around as much.

Regarding NYE itself, I didn't stay up. I did pop into Animal Crossing, where the fireworks there were mostly visual (with some light pops). I'm not bothered by fireworks though (or gunshots, I shoot paper targets recreationally), but I don't like crowds. So I don't do NYE stuff.

I think it depends on what parts of "getting into a new year" your having challenges with. For me, a new year just mean changing what year I date things, need to rember to write 2026 now instead of 2025. But so is remembering the change of month, or day.

Of course a new year can bring different challenges to everyone.