this post was submitted on 23 Nov 2025
638 points (98.0% liked)

Microblog Memes

9707 readers
2358 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Nangijala@feddit.dk 27 points 2 days ago (1 children)

My womanly urge to kiss my lover goodbye and run after the train until I fall off the platform and break my neck.

"At least... I got... to say.... goodbye, 🪦"

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

My manly urge to watch, traumatized, as the train turns you to jelly, and I set out to avenge you and kill the bastard rookie cop whose badge caused you to trip onto the tracks.

[–] Nangijala@feddit.dk 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

My ghostly urge to haunt you in order to tell you that I was just a clutz and no one else needs to die but I'm a ghost so I can't communicate that to you and instead you go on to wrongfully avenge my death while my presence gives you chronic pneumonia and paranoia.

Ps, sorry about that. I didn't know ghost essence was like black mold, mate. My bad.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Awful cold in here all of the sudden.

[–] Bosht@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago

It would have to be on a bench, your arm underneath your trench coat stemming the bleeding of a hidden wound that isn't revealed until you hand him the manila envelope. The rookie notices the blood smeared on the envelope, quickly pulls your coat open, but alas it's too late to save you.

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 39 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Reminds me of things I experienced

012

[–] sassymov@piefed.blahaj.zone 24 points 2 days ago

Not enough bleeding. Next!

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You were SO close to meeting a bond character.

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 2 points 1 day ago

Ah, from Russia with Love

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That’s a good experience.

[–] A_norny_mousse@feddit.org 2 points 2 days ago

It was. Each wagon had a coal burner for heating, so there was smoke in the air.

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 24 points 2 days ago (1 children)

“I was wrong about you, Rookie. You’ve got what it takes. I know you’ll make me prou—“

Mendozaaaaaa!

[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What a delightful title you've chosen.

A+ would meme again

[–] marzhall@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

If unaware, you may enjoy this contest (of which I've chosen the 2021, but there are many and they are great)

adding the 2012 because it's just the best

[–] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org 16 points 2 days ago (1 children)

the masculine urge to die

yeah I had that too until I started hormones

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 14 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Now it's a feminine urge to die?

[–] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] the_mighty_kracken@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Dingleberrydipndots@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yeah, I don't really know how to properly reply to that. I am happy for them, though.

[–] SnoringEarthworm@sh.itjust.works 19 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Masculine urge to give my partner the evidence as I skip town to ~~retire~~ open a beach side restaurant in a tropical paradise.

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Also gives you a chance to be brought back for the sequel!

Nah, that's two days away.

[–] ComradePorkRoll@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Slowly bleed out? Yes. Be a cop? Abso-fucking-lutely not.

[–] Noodle07@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Rookie partner in crime !

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] ComradePorkRoll@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Since we're talking fantasies then I'll go with martyr for the cause

[–] whyNotSquirrel@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] whotookkarl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 2 days ago (3 children)

There's a meme about men choosing one of three aesthetics; noir detective, military historian, or something else I forget the third stereotype. For the men pretending they're in a dime store 1920s pulp crime thriller novel during a mundane day this is the perfect setting for a melodramatic ending, that often took place at train, bus, or air ports.

[–] falseWhite@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] the_mighty_kracken@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (6 children)
[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Now you're getting it!

load more comments (5 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Have you seen Blade Runner 2049?

[–] Rezoie@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

The last scene where he just lays on the staircase is crazy lol

[–] xxce2AAb@feddit.dk 6 points 2 days ago

That's very specific, but I can see it.

[–] radiouser@crazypeople.online 6 points 2 days ago

"As the weather worsened, I caught a glimpse of the rusted shells of previous lives that had been lived out here in this swampy shit hole, and I wondered if I would end up the same way, or what would happen to the girl I was supposed to protect."

My desert dweller urge to nearly fall on my face recover and then get sent sliding into the sunset by a gust of wind at a place like this.

This has actually happened to me once in a very scenic location, the other time was in a 711 parking lot where I rammed into the back of my Jeep Cherokee.

[–] TypFaffke@feddit.org 3 points 2 days ago

The perfect death doesn't exi.....

load more comments
view more: next ›