this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] luciferofastora@feddit.org 3 points 3 days ago

Why is nobody commenting on the phone battery?

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 13 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I'm a girl. I'm not interested in Haskell, that's too frigging endofunctiorific. Erlang! That's what all the cool guys are doing.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 4 points 6 days ago

What about going an extra step into Elixir?

[–] bestelbus22@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago

Hello everyone, and welcome to yet another recreational programming session with who?

[–] biggeoff@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 days ago

Based Tsoding

[–] mudkip 4 points 6 days ago

Well, JSON is an easy format to parse. The spec can fit onto one page.

[–] balsoft@lemmy.ml 101 points 1 week ago (6 children)

You gotta admit though, Haskell is crazy good for parsing and marshaling data

[–] marcos@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (10 children)

Yes. I'm divided into "hum... 100 lines is larger than I expected" and "what did he mean 'from scratch'? did he write the parser combinators? if so, 100 lines is crazy small!"

But I'm settling in believing 80 of those lines are verbose type declarations.

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[–] magic_smoke@lemmy.blahaj.zone 84 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Jokes on her, I've transitioned since last Christmas.

[–] Fisherswamp@programming.dev 83 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You can still bring a girl though

[–] magic_smoke@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 3 days ago

Mission failed successfully: I'm bringing my enby instead and you can't stop me.

[–] chellomere@lemmy.world 63 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I am the girl! Hmm, but maybe I'll bring another one too? 🤔

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[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 80 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Who needs a girl when you have monads to keep you warm?

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[–] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 61 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

No mom, I'm gonna BE a girl for Christmas. puts on programming socks

[–] Quibblekrust@thelemmy.club 4 points 6 days ago

That's 100% how I read it at first.

[–] yetAnotherUser@lemmy.ca 39 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You just need to find a girl that also likes Tsoding! Then, you can ask her "Hey, do you have plans for Christmas? I'd love it if we could do AoC (Advent of Code) in a language we both hate!"

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[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 37 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This kind of text hits differently when you're a lesbian.

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 14 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Wouldn’t it hit the same as it would a straight male?

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 17 points 6 days ago

POV: Not all moms are accepting of their daughters being into girls.

[–] lemmydividebyzero@reddthat.com 36 points 1 week ago (10 children)

There are far more male programmers... As a programmer, be gay or stay alone... Choose!

[–] psud@aussie.zone 4 points 5 days ago

It's odd in the Australian public service, with COBOL programmers. They've been in the job long enough that they started when the public service was the only employer who would employ women as programmers. I'm on the systems analyst side of the fence, the programmers I have worked with include a bit more than 60% women

I think all the programmers I know are married or gay or not interested. I think the gay ones are mostly married too.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Oh that explains why my wife is gay

And clearly it worked!

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[–] undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch 25 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Can programmers only be with other programmers or am I missing something?

[–] lemmydividebyzero@reddthat.com 11 points 6 days ago

But you kind of have to leave the house for that... I mean... We talk about programmers....

/s

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 days ago

Well yeah, obv. But not enough girls in computer science, so like the fishes, some of them magically turn into girls after a while.

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[–] RedSnt@feddit.dk 28 points 1 week ago (7 children)
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[–] jerkface@lemmy.ca 24 points 1 week ago

I don't think "programmer" fully captures the reality of being an emacs-based programmer.

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