Fake: anon paid a woman
Gay: anon didn’t get a boner
this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2025
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"I see you more as a brother"
"How much to see me as a step brother?"
Drop the $600 under a bed for her to reach it
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> Boo hoo I am going to be a 40 year old virgin!
And? I'm a 29yr old who is still a kissless virgin. Just try to get some good friends or something. Improve your career and climb up that ladder, then sex or relationships won't even matter anymore. Get off of 4chan.
Wtf no your 9-5 (or in your case im guessing much longer) isn't a replacement for a relationship.
If you're somehow able to do nothing but work and self improvement all day and be satisfied with just that in your life then good for you but don't assume everyone can just adapt to that mindset.
Humans are not evolved to find intimacy so irrelevant.
This is a green text so I'm gonna suspend as much reality as I can.
This is not gonna go over well but here we go.
If you want to talk to women or whatever romantic/sexual partner you'd prefer, why the fuck are we paying women to approach them in a non-romantic/sexual professional setting and then being upset?
Either open up to people, lower your standards, or increase your own self-worth to approach whatever arbitrary standards you've made for you.
Talking to people in a romance/sex setting isn't a fucking myth, it's a very everyday part of life that every single person thinks about. Approach it like that, don't be an asshole, and above all go out and have fun.
There is someone for you, and even if you don't think so, there's someone exactly like you willing to take the same risk.
If you've read this, and you're upset, it's on you. Go outside and fucking try.
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Some people find sex less important than others and prefer to focus their energy on other aspects of their lives.
No debate there but I don't think you can extend that truth into suggesting that everyone could just as easily be fulfilled if they just "focus their energy on other aspects of their lives".
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The idea that intimacy is required to live a fulfilling life is the lie. There are famous examples of people who were life long virgins. A few of them were in unconsummated marriages.
I would argue the reverse is also true. There were famous people with intimate relationships that have very unfulfilling lives.
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Bro…I’m glad you’re happy. If you do get the chance for a kiss though, it’s worth trying it out. They feel nice.
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I was 27 when i did the deed for the first time. It was very overrated. I'm almost 40 now. Ive been married, tried a few partners, it just didn't matter. But before 27 I thought I must be missing out and got sad over it. Nah man it's really nbd.
It's not a big deal, except that now you know it's not a big deal. When people are hung up about it, releasing that can be a help.
It's society putting sex on pedestal. I agree when I did the deed for the first time, I feel it is overrated. Sorry if i might slight someone here, but from my observation, it is kind of the shallower folks who put too much value on sex.
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I'm literally gonna be a 40 year old virgin bros
OP:
yeah maybe hire an actual prostitute instead of assuming all women offering a service you don't understand are actually just whores
anon deserves his blue balls
Anon is very obviously describing a prostitute who lives somewhere where it is illegal and thus advertising with innuendo. Anon was turned down by a prostitute. Also the only one calling women whores was you.
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>get psych degree
>become disillusioned with the world and my minuscule place in it
>distaste for society rising
>decide to open a little witch shop
>even offer subtle counseling
>occasionally rip chuds out of their hate holes
>never had a customer leave without personal growth
>be yesterday
>laundromat fire left me with barely any clothes
>fuckthisqueerhatingearth.png
>still have customers today
>can’t cancel without incurring penalties
>fuckthisqueerhatingcreditprocessor.fat
>smell like burnt plastic
>wearing rescued sheets from head to toe
>appointments not going too bad considering the circumstances
>then arrived the mound
>a ball of unwashed hair stretching out into a protective sphere
>sebum flows and drips from my bead draped doorframe as walks in
>understand immediately that I have to do something about this
>I’ll save this one Jonny
>but I can’t get a word out of him
>he communicates only in grunts
>he's distracted for some reason
>finally give up as the hour elapses
>grasp failure for the first time
>as he leaves, he suddenly turns, whipping salty droplets onto my face
>I convulse but keep my composure
>finally hear his voice
>think we’re finally going to talk
>he extends a wad of money toward me and begs for a handy
>the straw that broke the camel’s back
>can barely squeak out an apology as I exit the room and begin crying
>I just wanted to help
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That's why you make an agreement in advance.
IMO the worst thing about being a virgin is that it's forbidden to have sex, at least according to your caring parents, teachers, and social context. It's more about breaking the nonsensical rules than actually about having sex, at least that's how it was for me.
it's forbidden to have sex
Yep. I grew up in upper class britain and it's sad how here too that was somehow, without ever explicitly being said, drilled into me.
Edit: nobody ever told me that sex was bad, but that's the view I took away for some reason?
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My gay friends call me a platinum star because I never fucked a woman and I'm a cesarian section.
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pulls out $600 and asks for happy ending
You're not a virgin because you're bad with women. You're a virgin because you're bad with money.
Go to a rave and do some meth.
If you don't get to rail someone / get railed, contact me for further instructions.
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it's not the sex that I crave, just a physical warmth would be great
This is a really common sentiment. Humans are social apes but many cultures have severely curtailed what kind of touch is considered appropriate.
I highly recommend hanging with cats. When I was younger, I volunteered at a cat rescue. Friendly cats are almost always down to be pet and to rub their furry little faces all over you. It's hard to feel as lonely when you're hanging out with your cat buds, and the rescue cats need friends too.
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Allow me to introduce you to... the London Undeground trains! The Northern line in summer rush hour is like a bunch of penguins huddling together for warmth in a hot oven.
EDIT: I think I misunderstood what you wanted but I hope you got a chuckle out of it.
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I have never fucked a woman but I fucked my first man at 29. Does that make me virgin?
The writers of "The Ethical Slut" advocate for a very broad definition of having sex. They even have a (tongue-in-cheek) bit where they say that by reading the book, you and the authors are engaging in a form of having sex.
I'm not sure I totally agree with going that far, but I do think a broad definition is better.
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I was afraid of that as well
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