tbf, this seems like the sort of marriage where sitting in a parking lot and eating an entire Bloomin' Onion might be necessary.
this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2025
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Chapotraphouse
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ive literally just ordered one of those before and ate it all
and then had greasy diarrhea
You could tell by the way he shit himself and it smelled like fried onion?
I have not even seen a blooming onion. But looking at Google images, it seems like it will spread crumbs everywhere
It does. I had one a few weeks ago for the first time in a decade and its....okay. If ya like fried onion rings, its that, with a tangy sauce. Don't go out of your way for one.
Deep fried artichoke hearts though, those are fire.
I make chili a lot and I put a ton of red onion in it. Everyone complains I have onion farts.
The bloomin bloomin onion
Can't people just say "father fucking" like a normal person.
Root me dad onion
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I am sorry, but I couldn't help myself. It's my character
Wait is “blooming onion” the name of the dish or is this weird American fake swearing
You cut the top of it in a few directions so that it unfolds in a way vaguely like a flower and deep fry it.
And then you dip the onion petals in comeback sauce and hoo shit is it fucking delicious with a glass of beer
Plus you get to shit liquid afterwards which is fun
Yeah I usually get one at the local harvest festival each year. Can't eat it alone though, it's a lot. This lady's husband is unreal for eating her whole blooming onion in the car.
NGL that looks kinda good in a 3am way
It's absolutely fucking good, and they serve it with a slightly spicy horseradish mayo
It's also literally 20,000 calories for one of them
Aside from steakhouses, they're pretty common festival food, so more like noon but it's chilly out and you're drinking anyways.
NGL I thought it was a faux swear.
I once did this to an order of fries from Five Guys in college, my dorm-mate was PISSED!
Random comment but if you like fried onion, take a fennel bulb, cut it into strips, then deep fry those until crispy and brown, then toss in some seasoning. The licorice taste becomes pretty muted and even people who don't like fennel will be like "oh that's good it tastes like a fried onion"
no need to even bread or batter them i just raw dogged it into the oil
I bet it'd be really good with that horseradish mayo