this post was submitted on 28 Jul 2025
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Microblog Memes

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[–] yngmnwntr@lemmy.ml 72 points 1 week ago
[–] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 66 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This kills the joke, but:

It's all a stage play. SMB3 was the first (and maybe only) game to come out and say this outright, but it makes too much sense in all the others as well. That's why everyone is still friends and goes out go-karting and playing golf and tennis on the weekends. That's why we've "defeated" Bowser two dozen times including dropping him into literal magma and then he's back again next game.

No one was ever in danger, it's just, soap operas are the main export of the Mushroom Kingdom. They sold us a story about love, danger, and the fury of a righteous man, and we've been eating up the sequels for 30 years. It's Mushroom Kingdom Star Wars.

[–] HappyFrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 day ago

Now this is some game theory shit, lol

[–] frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 43 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Bowser being in Mario Kart is like Osama Bin Laden being in NASCAR.

[–] Grimy@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

Since Peach definitely wasn't being kidnapped, is she or Toad G.W.Bush in this scenario.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Lifecoach5000@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Nah he just drove over a banana peel and spun out.

[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 43 points 1 week ago

It's either you, him, and your girlfriend racing or just him and your girlfriend racing.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Nintendo made it canon like last week; but Mario and Peach are "just good friends".

[–] Muaddib@sopuli.xyz 10 points 1 week ago
[–] individual@toast.ooo 10 points 1 week ago

with benefits

[–] psmgx@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Or recreational tennis.

Or the obscure Mario Teaches Typing. Like, why is a plumber qualified to teach typing?

[–] Evkob@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 week ago

Like, why is a plumber qualified to teach typing?

They'll let anyone teach typing. Heck, I was personally taught by Garfield!

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 9 points 1 week ago

Imagine if they kept the Italian accent stereotype so most words he taught you to type were appended with random As.

It's-a me! Mario! I'm-a gonna teach you-a typing!

[–] theuniqueone@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 week ago

Mario believes in keeping politics strictly out of sports.

[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

i guess it is funny, but then again what kind of plumbing problems led one into taking part at all ?

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 week ago

Brooklyn plumbing problems

I think it’s a turtle

[–] commiunism@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago

just because they break each other's balls all the time doesn't mean they can't be friends

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

They're really in a poly relationship and Mario has a cuckolding fetish.

[–] axEl7fB5@lemmy.cafe 1 points 1 week ago

I would also support my younger brother

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Valid.

However I would take part in presenting said lizard with a certain very special crown & see where the night goes.