this post was submitted on 05 May 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Anon accidentally makes a camgirl rethink her life (lemmy.today)
submitted 4 days ago by MacNCheezus@lemmy.today to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works
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[–] monkeyman69@lemmynsfw.com 103 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Don't worry Anon, she was just prepping her Stegosaurus cosplay outfit with multiple dildo plating.

[–] BreadOven@lemmy.world 44 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Thagomizer dildo?

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago

Thagomizer? I hardly know her!

[–] scytale@lemm.ee 6 points 3 days ago

!fakebandnames@lemmy.world

[–] monkeyman69@lemmynsfw.com 6 points 4 days ago

Oh my.. Thank you for the correct term, I'm sure she's been thagomized to the Cretaceous and back by now.

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 3 points 4 days ago

dildo thagomizer!

[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 85 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Fake: Dinosurs aren't real

Gay: Wants to talk about dinosaurs instead of porn

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 10 points 3 days ago

Plot twist: anon is a scaly furry

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 46 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I’m mostly hung up on the fact that he just happened to have an account for a cam site with tokens already funded and ready to go. Something tells me this wasn’t his first time.

[–] MinFapper@startrek.website 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I don't think he ever said it's his first time

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 6 points 3 days ago

Not explicitly, no

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

Not only was it wild he coincidentally had the account ready, it's equally wild that this girl never thought about her father before this random stranger brings it up while she's trying to work. Really wild stuff, almost makes you wonder.

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 days ago (1 children)

wait thats gay? am i gay? oh no

what about other extinct groups of animals, like pterosaurs? is wanting to talk about those gay too?

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

What do you mean other extinct groups? That implies dinosaurs are extinct.

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

i always forget birds exist, sorry

edit: and i also forgot about the whole state of Acre, Brazil

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 2 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Wait, what happens in Acre?

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 2 points 2 days ago

It's an landlocked equivalent to the Bermuda Triangle

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 days ago

it is heard around all of Brazil that there are dinosaurs in Acre, but nobody has ever been there to truly know

[–] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 4 days ago

More like Ace

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 44 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I mean the odds of her having daddy issues were over 90%

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

And the odds of her never having pondered her father except for this one time when she was working: 0%

[–] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 16 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Obi wan Kenobi'd her.

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 4 points 3 days ago

“These aren’t the daddies you’re looking for”

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 12 points 4 days ago

Me on Lemmy NSFW every day.