82
submitted 5 months ago by TheDeed@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net

Sometimes people I just met (in a platonic context) will ask me things like "hey, what's your Instagram, let's keep in touch!"

My standard answer is that I don't do social media, but I have found that people take it as bragging perhaps? I get answers like "oh, good for you! I wish I didn't" or whatever.

If I say oh here's my number that seems too odd these days, people not that much younger than me (I'm 31) don't seem to text anymore. They use fb messenger or Instagram or others.

Also saying something like "I'm a privacy advocate and I use the fediverse" is also an odd thing to say unless I'm around techy people and even then it's weird tbh.

How do I approach this? I don't think I am better than people that use social media, its just not for me. I would prefer to text but I am not sure that works for a lot of people.

Or should I just bite the bullet and get an Instagram so that I don't seem weird, and then perhaps ask for further contact details via that platform?

Abstaining from social media can be extremely alienating.

autistic btw if you couldn't tell lmao, I have spent a lot of time thinking about this problem

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 32 points 5 months ago

Try saying something like "Sorry, I used to do social media but it added to my stresses so I stopped."

[-] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 25 points 5 months ago

I've found it's a really reliable tactic when you apologize for a shortcoming when you can't/won't do something (i.e. boundaries).

"It's not that you're not valid, it's that I'm a big dumb doodoo brain that I can't handle this thing that you want. This is what I can offer though."

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 11 points 5 months ago

Yeah, I apologize and say something like "I know, it's weird—I don't exist."

Then I say I only use Signal. Usually gets people to download it.

Who are these people who don't text anymore?

[-] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 11 points 5 months ago

Yep, it's a good way to acknowledge and appreciate an offer while declining it in a way that doesn't reflect poorly on their offering it.

this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
82 points (100.0% liked)

askchapo

22768 readers
358 users here now

Ask Hexbear is the place to ask and answer ~~thought-provoking~~ questions.

Rules:

  1. Posts must ask a question.

  2. If the question asked is serious, answer seriously.

  3. Questions where you want to learn more about socialism are allowed, but questions in bad faith are not.

  4. Try !feedback@hexbear.net if you're having questions about regarding moderation, site policy, the site itself, development, volunteering or the mod team.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS