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this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2024
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During the Great Recession I spent a few months at a temp IT job for an environmental services contractor, helping their solo sysadmin keep up with a huge hiring boom as they got hired to work the Deepwater Horizon cleanup. Over the course of my employment, I gradually worked out that my boss wasn't supposed to be a one man shop, but the other guy was the CEO's adult son... and he literally never showed up in the office except to pick up his paycheck, like the scene from Arrested Development.
As it turns out, the paycheck wasn't the only thing Failson Junior was getting from the company. His house? It was a "branch office," so the company paid the mortgage and all the utilities. His car was a company car, for all the business-critical IT emergencies he never responded to, and his phone provided by the company so that he could ignore support calls. With all those company perks, Junior spent all his time fishing and coaching Little League, while his supposed boss slowly went insane as he struggled to support the IT needs of 500 people instead of the usual 50.
As you might guess, Junior's nepobaby lifestyle wasn't the only fucky thing about that company. The corporate accountant complained the the CEO and her husband treated the company's accounts like their private piggy bank, putting everything from iPads to RVs in the company's name. They'd very nearly pushed the company to insolvency before using some very suspect MBE/WBE creds to snag a piece of the Deepwater Horizon cleanup operation. When I joined up, they pitched themselves as a tight-knit, family-owned business. After the wellhead got capped, the cleanup wound down, and I was laid off, I vowed to never again work for another family-owned business.