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I'm sorry this happened to you and that you still have to deal with this
Having said that, out of genuine curiosity, why is it that you're still dealing with this 50 years later? I'm very sure I'm wrong here, but doesn't there come a time you can give this a place and go on with life and be happy? Seriously not trying to flake or anything, really just curious how people get stuck in that.
The Wikipedia article on CPTSD would be a good place to start. It does not just go away after a long enough time.
Something like that happening to you at a young age shaped your development and the person you become.
The downvotes are unfair. There are no stupid questions, only stupid answers.
No, such things never go away. People can learn to to better deal with it, they can learn to cope better with the pain, they can learn skills to better handle anxiety/panic, they even can go through lenghty programs to learn to overall feel better.
But these traumas never go away, people can't escape them. In the best case it is no around-the-clock hindrance anymore. The triggers stay, the nightmares stay. The memories stay.
Reading the mentioned article about (c)PTSD might expand your view. Everyone should know, so we wouldn't throw questions like this at survivors. As they all have, at least, PTSD. And often many illnesses more. Not only psychological.