this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2026
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If you try "openers" on women walking into elevators like a captive audience you deserve to die in a fire
I just never talk to anyone ever. Because I don’t want people to talk to me and I follow the golden rule.
There's nothing you can say to a group of women who aren't interested in you that will sway their mind.
The women got to be thirsty as fuck to override the lifetime of having their defense up to let someone hit on them unless they're into it.
Counter point:
I always liked this elevator. It picks me up when I'm down.
Counter counterpoint:
Unfortunately it always brings me down when I'm up.
In a fancy hotel, a boy got on and told the elevator operator that he was staying on the top floor. When the doors opened the operator said "Your floor, son." The boy asked why he called him son, and the operator replied, "Well, didn't I bring you up?"
Got it to move sideways. When I passed out drunk.
Oh, the dad's gambit.
I was thinking... I dont talk to people in elevators unless they talk to me and then it is very, very brief.
A captive audience for 15 seconds at which point they have a built-in reason to leave though
That's 15 seconds too long. You're not entitled to annoy people just because they'll be able to leave soon.
I think blanket ruling that "trying openers" is "annoying people" is invalid. Yeah, it might be annoying most of the time, but so are a lot of interactions. If you follow that road you'd end up with anyone who talks to someone ever deserving to die in a fire which I think is unreasonable.
If the worst thing that happens because you shoot your shot is you annoy someone for 15 seconds, then whatever. Take no for an answer is all I ask.
If those interactions are unnecessary then they shouldn't happen either. Leave people the fuck alone.
I never said anything about anyone deserving to die in a fire.
The whole mindset of even thinking about an "opener" or "shooting your shot" is creepy and entitled as fuck. Just be fucking normal, enter the elevator and say hi, then stfu and mind your business unless they give some indication that they're interested in conversing with you. You're not entitled to anyone's attention and you don't have a shot unless they offer you one.
I do because I'm shy. But I think it's insane to go around wanting to police talking to strangers when in public. That's part of what it means to be in public. Someone might talk to you. The horror.
Shooting your shot is how you offer someone their shot. Interactions - which, even with strangers, are a normal part of the human experience - don't happen unless someone goes first. If the other person ignores you, says they're not interested, or indicates a lack of interest with a non-committal response, that's when politeness dictates you shut up.
No, but you joined the discussion on the same side as someone who did, and never distanced yourself from that statement until now.
Yeah, which why you have to read the fucking room. If you get in an elevator and they don't greet or otherwise make it apparent that they're open to conversation, you do not have a shot to take and they don't want one with you. Leave them alone. They're not in public to be fucking bothered, they're there to meet friends, or partake in some service or event. If you're not part of those things then you're not invited.
Fuck off, I wasn't taking anyone's side, I was calling out your bullshit about someone being trapped in an elevator with you entitling you to their attention.
What a toxic fucked up shitty way to be. I'm glad I won't be seeing your comments anymore. This is precisely the kind of interaction that takes Lemmy from a magical community to having the huge caveat of having to block 500 users to tolerate it. Shame on you.
Yeah, that guy is arguing that it's okay to harass women in elevators and putting words in my mouth but I'm the toxic one...
You keep saying "entitled to someone's attention" but talking to someone doesn't require any special entitlement or even attention. They can ignore you.
This is the first you've said about reading the room, too, so it sounds like you don't actually have an objection to deploying an "opener" - you're just assuming it's being done without exchanging a smile or something first.
And don't get pissy because you pushed back against someone pushing back against something, didn't actually agree with the something, didn't make that clear, and then were assumed to agree with it. If you leap to someone's defence but don't agree with half their comment you can just say that and it helps everyone.
I don't think there's anything else to gain in this conversation.
That's a faulty arguments, people are also not entitled to not be annoyed by the mere existence of others choosing to live their lives in a way that doesn't actually hurt anyone.
Your existence doesn’t annoy me, your insistence upon my attention does.
That's why I ignore people I don't want to give my attention to, works like a dream. Earbuds and sunglasses are like social PPE if you want them to be, maybe give that a shot if you can't handle day-to-day human interactions.
I just avoid human interaction altogether. I work from home and don’t go anywhere. Works a treat.
So if I scream in your face for the duration of the ride on an elevator that's perfectly fine because I'm not actually physically hurting you?
It doesn't make you look very sane, but as long as you don't have any communicative respiratory diseases, yeah it's whatever. If it meets any legal definitions of harassment or abuse, then sure, I'd be legally entitled to press charges if I so choose. But if it's a one-off...idk, plenty of mentally ill people yell gibberish at random people in public places every day, you're just one more.
my new go to when people show up at my door selling shit (especially religion)
Unless the guy in and pushed the same floor button as you.
Did you ever consider thinking something is gross without wishing a painful death on the perpetrator?
Edit: of course they didn't. Being a zealot who wants to kill their "enemies" is fine and also very worthy of many upvotes. Of course I'm evil for pointing out how fucked this is.
I’m of the opinion it should be painful or death. People who try to pick up ladies, preach, etc to a captive audience do need the pain as they ignore words. It’s the behavior that leads to bigger problems and needs to be nipped in the bud.
That's fucked up
The fact that you picked defending “guys who try to pick up women when they’re stuck on an elevator together” as a hill to stand on is fucked up. The fact that you don’t have the experience to recognize that certain aggressively shameless people don’t care about a verbal reprimand is also telling.
Now just in case it’s where the hangup is, my core position is incredibly nuanced. Reason should be the go-to and I look down on people who think they can solve all their problems with their fists. Don’t hit kids. Parts of the criminal justice system are draconian and counterproductive. The ultra rich don’t care about fines or laws and need the occasional bat to the knee.
They’re not defending that, they’re criticizing your apparent thirst for violence. I agree with them, you seem pretty messed up for reacting the way you do.
I also do not like the idiotic pick-up culture and I especially dislike subjecting someone to it when they cannot easily leave. It is pretty insane though to wish for someone to ‘die in a fire’ for this. And you’re either too stubborn to back down or you really (think you) mean what you say. I’m going to assume the former, which just makes you an annoying loser instead of a full-blown psycho.
People can be two things
Letting them live is how we get Trump, fire is much better
but where else am i going to meet someone
To answer your question. Somewhere where you share something in common. Like hobby or work or school or mutual something.
Unless both parties seek to meet new people, odds are, you're not breaking any ice in today's world.
perfect, we share the elevator in common
the only opener allowed is the open door button
Precisely.