this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2026
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Despite my one moment of sheer misandry, which I apologize for...I love you guys ❤️

I probably can't offer much in the way of comfort...

NSFW, TMI...I mean, all I can offer is my body, and I doubt you'd want that :P...

...but I really, truly, honestly appreciate all of you guys. Really 💜

Without men, my life would be pretty boring and honestly pointless. And I don't just mean for sexual reasons...

NSFW, TMI...well, the sexual reasons are a big and important part of it too, ngl, but they're not the only reason.

I see and appreciate you. You matter 🩷
To me. To your families. To everyone here ❤️

This isn't much comfort, but if any of you guys needs someone to talk to, my Matrix account is:
@horny_miisha:chat.blahaj.zone
Feel free to reach out!

You're not alone. You're never alone. I love you guys 💜

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[–] bimbobear@lemmy.world 27 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (3 children)

I'm just going to share this here, and it's entirely anecdotal.

I'll put it behind a drop down so read it of your own volition.

spoiler

Somehow despite being quite the introvert I have somehow managed to encounter numerous men who have been horrifically abused by the women in their life, myself included. For example one young lad who regularly slept with his own mother, a grandmother who did wildly inappropriate things with her grandkids (hiding candy in her clothing...)

I lived with emotional abuse from my mother, and a creepy cougar teacher who was far to interested in a younger me.

Later in life, I had a small group of friends and out of the 4 of them, all 4 had been out right sexually assaulted.

One guy was roofied at a club by a wannabe dominatrix who didn't understand BDSM, woke up in her bed chained up.

Another woke up to an older female cousin raping him while he was sleeping on a couch.

Then there was the guy who worked in bars, hen parties were a nightmare and plenty of women would get handsy and see nothing wrong with it.

There's more but I don't remember right now, and I don't want to dig it out.


So in summary.. why am I mentioning this here?

It's not to bash anyone, but rather to suggest that just like many guys are told to watch their brothers for abusive behaviour we should encourage women to be aware of the kind of abuse that other women can dish out and intervene if possible.

Also, if you do try to engage with a guy about his emotional state, do consider that it is extremely common for men to have in the past opened up to a partner only to have it weaponised against him thus making him hyper vigilant about doing so again.

[–] DeadDigger@lemmy.zip 14 points 3 days ago

The catholic Church in France alone has sexually abused at least 200000 children between 1950 and 2020. that is 1% of the population. In the context of catholic abuse it's mostly males so it is safe to assume that around 2% of the male french population was sexually abused as a child by the catholic Church.

The notion that sexual abuse is only a women's problem is pretty much a myth.

[–] ShadowOfMiisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Oh dear god...
I'm so sorry you went through that. Honestly that's terrible and it's something nobody deserves to go through. I'm so sorry 🫂

I hope you're doing at least a bit better. I have my own (serious) issues and I'm trying to get a therapist in the hopes of treating those...

Again, I'm so sorry you went through that. That's honestly brutal. Even if this is naive...I sincerely hope we can both get over our traumas. Sorry I can't offer much support 💙

[–] bimbobear@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Heya!

Well yeah.. at the end of the day we're all human :)

I'm doing somewhat better, my life is... weird. But compared to the difficulties some people live with, I'm content enough.

But I also do recognise that in many ways, I'm pretty broken. But, we keep going, try and find joy where we can :)

There's a lot more I could say, I have some views that would probably be considered... weird as I was raised by a 2nd generation English feminist. But I also kind of don't want to side track the thread :)

Please, don't feel bad side tracking! This was meant to be a kind of vent thread for all the men over here. Don't feel bad, it's why I made the post ❤️
I definitely won't judge you. And (I'd hope) nobody else will either.

[–] Doomsider@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

My father was raped by a male acquaintance as a young man. He was a state champion wrestler and it really messed with his head. He never told me this, which is normal, but I did find out about it. Most rapes are done by other men and it is way more common than men admit to.