this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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49
What is a gender neutral honorific for non-binary folk? (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by SirSamuel@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
129 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

I was raised to address strangers and those I wish to show social deference to as "Sir" or "Ma'am". It's a difficult habit to break, as it is deeply engrained.

What is an equivalent gender neutral honorific that is relatively common in English? If I can't break the habit I'd rather have a substitute word to use instead of an awkward pause in the middle of addressing someone

I'd just use Google to ask but I'd rather ask the people directly rather than an AI generated answer based off of Reddit threads

ETA: I suppose if Yessir and Yes'm work, Yesn't could too? Mostly joking… but maybe… 🤔

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[–] GalacticGrapefruit@lemmy.world 8 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago) (3 children)

Personally, I like "Sir" as in the Star Trek/Orville usage. It did happy things to my brain when the crew on the Orville referred to Commander Kelly Grayson (a cis woman) as "Sir", respectfully referring to her by her proper title as a commanding officer. That was cool. I like the gender neutral "Sir" a lot.

But for casual usage, "Friend" or "Neighbor" is nice. "Hey, neighbor, you dropped this." "Excuse me, friend, lemme reach around you here."

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 2 points 18 hours ago

Yeah I think "sir" trumps madam because it's professional

[–] empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

I also like this interpretation. It's the same gender neutral connotation as the Cali surfer "dude" or "bro" used equally with everyone.

[–] white_nrdy@programming.dev 0 points 20 hours ago

Similar to "boi"

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 20 hours ago

I believe the US military uses sir gender neutrally and that's where those shows got it from.