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I'm going to be that person, and disagree with the common opinion here. Of course, my take is my own and will be different than others, so take everything below with the finest grain of salt.
I think it's perfectly fine to have friends of the opposite gender. And by opposite gender, I mean the gender you're attracted to. However, I do think it's an issue to have a best friend of the opposite gender. A best friend is the person you confide in, you can lean on when everything else is rough, who will be there no matter what. If that person is the opposite gender, and isn't your SO, then it's an affair; not necessarily a physical affair, but an emotional one at the very least.
The "waiting his turn" comment sounds like a little bit of immaturity mixed with jealousy. I don't mean immaturity as a negative; more like someone who has room to grow. Based on that comment though, it sounds like they aren't comfortable with the situation, even if they say they are.
I'm not saying you should break up. I'm not saying your SO thinks the same way I do. People are nuanced and I only have the very limited information you gave. Based purly on that, it sounds like your SO's thoughts lean the way mine do.
What it comes down to is what you and your SO think. If you're not on the same wavelength, then there will always be a wedge between you two. You can still make a relationship work, it's just going to be harder. On the flip side, if you're both, deep down, truly fine with it, then there is nothing to worry about, and you should go live your best lives.
Whatever happens, this random internet stranger wishes you both the best.
Completely agree. I think ideally your significant other should be regarded as your 'best' friend. You can, of course, have other friends. However, if my wife was confiding in another man, to speak plainly, I'd find that hurtful.