this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2025
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What I also hate is when people clearly want to ask me something over text but than go through the entire conversational starter rigmarole. And then even wait minutes before they reply.
Like
Friend: “hi”
Me: “hi how’s it going?”
5 minutes pass by
Friend: “I’m good how are you?”
Me: “I’m great, what’s up?”
4 minutes pass by
Friend: “Are you free this Sunday?”
Me: “Uh depends, you want to do something?”
6 minutes pass by
Friend: “Can you come over for lunch?”
Me: “yeah sure, what time?”
15 minutes pass by
Friend: “don’t know yet”
Like motherfucker just send it all in one text. Wasted 30 minutes for nothing
My brother keeps doing that, so I literally told him "I will not answer your message unless you state what you want in your first message". It's been about a year since I answered any of his messages. He usually just tells our parents and they ask me in a more reasonable manner.
This is why I'd rather just get a phone call. Those five-minute gaps are like 5-second pauses in speech.
Nohello.net
On dating apps I use "hey" to check if they even answer. Not gonna waste brainpower on people who never respond. I would never do this to friends though.
When I'm on dating apps, I get heys. I appreciate "hey". I'll look at the profile and if I like what I see, I'll respond. "Hey" is like on a marketplace posting if you message them saying "is this still available?" It's a message for a transaction, a request for a handshake, showing no hard feelings if no response because no emotion was invested.
Absolutely do this to friends. See how many heys you can go back and forth :D
Fuck. That shit drives me crazy. You gotta keep in mind though that chat is async and not everybody is like us and attention is on or off and lives on a computer or phone.
Have you considered carrying on with your day, rather than waiting, to avoid wasting the 30 minutes?
of course i carry on with my day, I'm not a moron. It's just annoying that I get interrupted multiple times in those 30 minutes because the other person decides to wait 5 minutes between each answer.