765
Tucker Carlson says Trump admin using Charlie Kirk’s killing to trample free speech
(www.independent.co.uk)
this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2025
765 points (99.4% liked)
politics
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"Finally! I've finished my kill-bot. Come, gather round, as I unveil it to the world"
"But Professor Killington"
"Yes, adorable, one-legged, orphan Timmy?"
"Why did you make a kill-bot?"
"Well, so it would indiscriminately murder anything and everything that moves, of course"
"But professor, that sounds dangerous"
"Don't be a fucking retard Timmy. I know what I'm doing"
"O-okay Professor"
"Now everyone gather round as I turn on the killbot for the very first time, and be amazed as it makes me pancakes"
flips switch
"OH NO, STOP, STOP, STOP KILLING ME, KILL-BOT OH MY GOD, MY SPLEEN, OH, IF ONLY SOMEBODY COULD HAVE FORRSEEN THIS TERRIBLE TURN OF EVENTS".
Timmy would go on to run for Congress on an anti killbot policy. He would lose to a bigoted blowhard who insisted on the right for all people to own killbots to make them pancakes.
Had I more upvotes to give...