this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2025
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[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 39 points 4 months ago (3 children)

It's really expensive here and I didn't have to pay a dime for the hospital and clinic visits or delivery or anything. I truly dont know how US people do it

[–] oddlyqueer@lemmy.ml 32 points 4 months ago

A lot of us don't. I mean I guess that's the point of the article. My partner and I have said for years "maybe, someday, when we can afford it" and just... never could afford it. Now pushing 40 and still can't. A kid would be a catastrophic cost for us at the moment. Simple as.

[–] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 28 points 4 months ago

they fight, get divorces, move in with parents, work extra hours at shitty jobs they hate, carry debt at 20% interest, and jobs that have OK insurance + parental leave are very competitive, and many don't blink twice at directly exploiting many others if it means their offspring are secure. because that's all that matters: the legacy of direct lineage.

[–] mickey@hexbear.net 25 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The people I know with kids started families in their 30s when they had 2 partners with PMC jobs and lived near grandparents or other extended family. The boomers were able to have kids in their 20s and buy a house with one full time income. Shit is totally unsustainable.

[–] redchert@lemmygrad.ml 26 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It was also way more common for relatives/neighbours to watch & take care of the kids if the parents were busy. It does take a village to raise a child and now the village got bulldozed for 8-lanes of traffic and black and white condoslop.

[–] mickey@hexbear.net 24 points 4 months ago

Yeah the dissolution of community is a big part. I remember when Sister Hillary had a book titled "It Takes a Village" and people were roasting her, but the people lambasting her grew up with that extended support! They might even talk about how it used to be that way!, and then not make the connection that losing that informal extended support is a factor in people having fewer kids or having kids later.

Something else that I think disrupts this is the expectation that people will have to move away from their home towns and families to become established economically. And even have to pick up stakes and make significant moves every few years to maintain their standard of living through moving for jobs. Capitalism has uprooted people and now the upshot is that people aren't reproducing the workers, this is not complicated to savvy.