this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2025
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The "for" part is what makes this a backhanded compliment. It heavily implies prejudice/preconceived notions, because there is no need to compare to the other group. While it might be a compliment directed at the person, it's implicity demeaning to the community you are getting compared to. It's not necessarily a firmly or consciously held believe, but it still shows what they are expecting.
I kinda see your point, but I think context is important here. For many trans people, part of transitioning includes working toward presenting as their identified gender, and that process can take time and effort. So when someone says "you look good for a trans man/woman", in a clumsy way, it might be meant as recognition of that effort, like saying, “you look exactly how you hoped to". Which is completely different from automatically assuming that all women are stupid for being women.
I can see what you mean, but you still get reminded that you are trans/don't get clocked fully as the gender you're presenting as.
I'm not saying it's perfect, but it's definitely not as "backhanded" as the other one. In fact, that "compliment", especially in the context of the meme, implies they didn't realize the person is transgender until it was somehow pointed out explicitly, because of the whole "wow, you're trans?" part.