this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2024
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[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 53 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Man who uses dead rat as alarm clock has opinions on sex and normativity: news at 10

[–] Aquilae@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Man who uses dead rat as alarm clock

With how dirty his room is, I genuinely can't tell if this is a joke or not

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 51 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Completely sincere. There was a decomposing rat corpse in his bedroom. Rather than remove it, he noticed that when the sun hit it the smell would get worse. That let him know it was morning. Behold the master race.

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 49 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it's moments like this that make me realize maybe I'm not such a big fuckup after all

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

There's this point where it becomes impressive because his life is like a rube goldberg machine for not washing his penis. My favourite cooking channel is like that, so disgusting that it becomes perplexing that it becomes educational that it becomes inspirational.

[–] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My favourite cooking channel is like that, so disgusting that it becomes perplexing that it becomes educational that it becomes inspirational.

Are you talking about about ordinary sausage or that British lady who just can't help but make everything terrible?

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Man who washes pan with CLR and shampoo in his bathtub, cooks a Christmas turkey cake with tuna because tuna is turkey with water instead of air, attempts to eat it, and vomits on the floor.

[–] combat_brandonism@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago

See he turns the tuna into turkey using a hairdryer on his stove. That adds the air back.

[–] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Is this like Listerine chicken, but unironically?

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

Completely unironic.

[–] Z_Poster365@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

Dude has scurvy because he refuses to ever eat any fruit. His entire life he had only eaten like 2 kinds of fruit. It's extremely sad to be honest, and indicates mental health issues. Combined with his mom being a hoarder, and him seemingly inheriting that, I feel bad mocking him for this. I just think he should focus on getting his shit together with his millions of dollars instead of rolling around in his filth for the hooting of millions of chuds.

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago

Nah it's legit. When I first heard of it I didn't believe it. I was likev

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Apparently doesn't brush his teeth either

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

think-about-it don't need to brush your teeth if you can just wake up and wipe all the blood onto the wall. 2 minutes vs 5 seconds.

[–] Z_Poster365@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

this is legitimately something he would say if questioned about it

[–] Sinister@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Didnt he kill his mom by letting her burn to death while on stream?

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You can't just leave a raid group. That inconveniences 24 people just to save your mom and you don't even know how long she'll be on fire. Your stats will look terrible if it doesn't outright cost you DKP.

[–] Z_Poster365@hexbear.net 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

brb moms on fire

[–] Zvyozdochka@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago

What the fuck.

[–] Z_Poster365@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

I haven't heard this, I believe she died at a hospital to complications related to COPD. She was a hoarder all her life and was breathing in fucked up molds and fumes I'm sure. Asmon quit college to stream and "watch after his mom" and their house was still a rat infested disease pit when she died, he had the money at the time to hire some people to clean the house up or get a nicer place but he didn't. She died from living in squalor, which is extremely sad. It's also sad that Asmon seems to also be a hoarder who lives in these conditions as well, even though he isn't poor like his mom was he just chooses to do so.

He should have gotten his mom to better living conditions. It was his responsibility and he had the money to do it, and she was suffering from medical issues and needed his help and he was negligent in his care. I don't know anything about her burning to death though