I'm not trying be a shitty competor here, despite leading with that. This is setting for "There is no hope for a better future, or present, so what do you find to live for" and for me it's my pets. I have my old dog Blue, four cats, and a new puppy cause Blue is getting on and needed a puppy to boost her spirits, mine, and teach the puppy the ropes before she's gone. It's making something worth eating out of 2-4 dollars a day, my favourite (tho it's a stupid amount of work and my rolling pin broke and I need to get a new one) is to make naan or tortillas, and this delightful mush of rice, lentils, peppers and curry-style seasoning. Delicious, gorgeous, and it feels so good to say to myself "If this were served at a restaurant it'd cost 20 dollars a plate and I made two days' calories for a fraction of the price" - I got lucky and met my now boyfriend on a Harvest Moon Let's Player's discord, he's even more ratfucked than I am on money being on disability and all so I don't know if there even is a future where we can move near one another, but god the company has changed the way I feel so much. Just having someone to turn to when you do a cool game thing or sent a picture of dinner or whatever, excellent change.

And that's kinda it - you live for the relationships you have, human or pet, and the actions you find a way to make meaning from and take some pride or joy in. There's no shortcuts worth taking, self delusion into false joy is just liberalism and I don't think msot people that make it to this site can just go to talk therapy and decide to blame themselves for their lives, chose to ignore society and the world at large being a dumpster fire, while believing it is magically fine and the themselves are millionaires in the making. If you live in a city, join any leftist org you can find, clannish internet quibbles aside just good lord it's nice to have people around.