So i’ve read your text (mostly in diagonal) and I think you’re not seeing your problem from a « good » perspective
You’re stuck into the Simulationist vs Imaginary/Cinematic game.
For exemple : Shadowrun is highly simulationist as opposed to Neon City Overdrive who is cinematic.
If you want fast roleplaying combat you need to be in the cinematic side, if you want 2min in world time being discussed for 2h you need simulationist
Pretty sure that’s 3 raccoon in a trench coat