It's even worse than that - Twilight was originally fanfic for Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles series, so it's all just Lestat with a fake mustache and sparkles.

ThanOS

Next time, Gort will install Debian and save himself the trouble

I'm surprised they didn't also coat it in radium to make it easier to find in the dark

My dad told me that walnuts were owl eggs.

He got in trouble when I stole all the walnuts in the house and wrapped them in nose tissues to keep them warm so they would hatch and I would have baby owls.

Facial images "stored for no more than 2 weeks" just means that they have 2 weeks to transfer the data to another agency with no storage or transfer requirements.

The downvotes only validate I’m right

You're not Galileo. To quote Carl Sagan:

"They laughed at Gallileo. They also laughed at Bozo the clown."

This is excellent recycling of the cringe original

OF COURSE he uses GoDaddy

OVERLAYS

Sorry for shouting, but they are very annoying.

NO I DO NOT WANT TO SIGN UP FOR YOUR NEWSLETTER, BLOGGER WITH A RECIPE I NO LONGER WANT

I would trust a wacky waving inflatable tube man at a used Renault car dealer before I would trust Oracle with absolutely anything of any value whatsoever.