[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 32 points 1 day ago

You sure do get what you pay for.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

I wish her the best, she had a rough time the last time. I hope she found some good sports psychologists or whatever she needed to help her focus and bring home some more gold.

If she wins any more medals she is going to have to buy them their own house lol.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

I never have mine, I spent half my life using payphones. I looked in my dream journal and I found a couple of dreams where I tried to use a payphone but it was out of order.

I asked the kid who works for me, he is 20 so he has never used a pay phone. He said he has his phone but it never works.

Maybe there is something to that...idk, I am just a peckerwood from South Texas who married the same batshit crazy woman twice so I am pretty stupid lol.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

We would all have a picnic

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

Alright, listen up. We have a fugitive on the run: Steve Bannon. We need all hands on deck to track him down. Our primary search areas are Taco Bells and other fast food joints. This is a coordinated effort, so follow these instructions carefully.

First, teams will be deployed to every Taco Bell in the vicinity. Check the dining area, restrooms, and parking lots. Speak with employees and customers. If anyone has seen him, get as much detail as possible about his direction of travel.

Second, expand the search to other fast food chains: McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, KFC, you name it. These are high-traffic locations where he might blend in easily. Again, cover every corner: inside and out.

Report in every 30 minutes with updates, even if you don’t find anything. This is a time-sensitive operation, and coordination is key.

Stay vigilant, stay sharp, and let’s bring Steve Bannon in.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 24 points 3 days ago

He should run, it would be hilarious.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

Are they going to release them all at once or do I have to wait until August to watch them?

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 10 points 5 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I got really into his books and music for a while. One day in the summer of 2004 I was on the hunt. Earlier in the day I had scored 2 boxes of Cuban Montecristo No.2 from a dude who sold that kind of shit.

I set off with a shirt pocket stuff full of Cuban cigars and started looking for a paperback copy of Curse of the Missing Doll Head. At the time I lived in a little town in North Texas and was striking out everywhere, but that day I was in San Antonio for the cigars. I hit all the Half Priced books and only found the book in hardback. I was giving up and headed back to where I was staying when I saw a little used bookstore in a shopping center. It was tucked back in the corner and I had never seen it before.

I went in and headed to the mystery section and there it was, one copy in paperback. I grabbed it and went to the cookbooks and quickly became oblivious to my surroundings. After spending about 2 hours going through the cookbooks and old magazines, they had an amazing amount of old Good Housekeeping, I went to pay for my couple of books and realized the place was packed.

I was halfway to the counter when this dude in a cowboy hat and a black and white western-patterned leather sports coat walked in everyone was clapping. I was like "Must be Burt Reynolds or something" and went to pay. The lady checked me out and asked me if I wanted to buy Kinky Friedman's new book for the signing. The light bulb is on. Burt Reynolds was something alright, it was Kinky Friedman.

I bought his new book The Prisoner of Vandam Street and got in line. It took about 30 minutes to get to him and I was one of the last 10 or so people. He took my book, asked my name, signed it with some witty remark, and looked up at me to hand it back and shake my hand when he saw the pointed end of the two Montecristos I had left sticking out of my shirt pocket. He asked me what I had. I told him "Cuban Montecristo No.2, just opened the box today" and I handed him one. He stood up and shook my hand and told me to hang on a minute.

He finished signing the rest of the line and then sat outside with me and we smoked those last two cigars. He signed a couple more books for me and we talked about Austin and my small North Texas town and the music there, and then he had to split. He said next time the cigar was on him or something clever like that and split.

I wish I could remember it better but I am glad it is fuzzy, it makes it sort of like a mystery or some stupid shit like that. I gave away 2 of the 3 Vandam Street books to friends who were fans and a few years later I lost the other two books in a flood in Houston.

Edit: formatting

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 26 points 5 days ago

Ah, the old Tarantula attack. They never see that one coming.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

We were 80s middle class both parents worked. My dad sold insurance and my mom was a nurse.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

If you can't run with the big dog stay on the porch.

[-] JesusSon@lemmy.world 38 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Bro when I was a kid I was into it all. Tamagotchi, hyper colors everything, Pogs, Beanie Babies, Slap bracelets, scooters (not the razors scooters the earlier BMX scooters), friendship bracelets, that kickball with the plastic ring you bounced on, moon shoes, Jams, Big Dog, I'm a dude that loved him some Polly Pockets, windbreakers, bomber jackets, M.U.S.C.L.E, G.I. Joe, Pound Puppies, Garbage Pale Kids, those puffy monster balls you squeezed and their eyes popped out, Shrinky Dinks, and then by the late 90s I was walking around with 30" cuffs in my Kikwear and a Kangol.

Edit: Big Dawg changed to Big Dog, changed 80s to BMX.

I showed this to my friend and he reminded me of the time we got really into Swatch Watches but our parents wouldn't buy them for us so we stole one and passed it back and forth until we got caught.

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JesusSon

joined 3 months ago