Deathguards
this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2026
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Depending where you live some lifeguards have more training than police, so naturally they are more qualified to make drowning decisions
New tv show premise: lifeguards do the police physical and police do the lifeguard physical.
Ooh, next you could match cops against firefighters!
Yes, meme... but!
I know a lifeguard and while he's generally an okay-ish human being, he is really not a guy you want to give authority to. You know the type, okay-ish people who become the. fucking. worst. as soon as they get their hands on the smallest amount of authority.
Judge Dredd - TOTALLY SUMMER
Summer of Dredd: High Tide
No, lifeguards are just swimming cops.
ACAB
Yes but then rename that to: Deathguard.
deathguard beating the shit out of lifeguard trying to rescue someone
“And they were known by no other name as The Deathguard. Whenever The Deathguard roamed the shores the mood of the bathing crowds instantly changed, as if a sudden thunderstorm had come rolling in. Mothers started looking for their children in fear, people hastily packed their belongings. Such was the fear that The Deathguard would bring forth.“
I mean,it's not a terrible idea
It is, but I still chuckled.
As long as I'm being held underwater by a slender brunette young woman in a Baywatch style red one-piece, I won't complain.
Choke me daddy
Every billionaire or trillionaire should have a thoroughly trained li… swimming guard! Yes, swimming guard.
Surfer Death Panels
I'm not sure I like the new version of the "I put you into this world, I can take you out of it" line abusive parents use any more than the original..
This needs to be posted all over the neighborhood taped to stop signs and stapled to wooden electric poles
It's fucked up that I'd be okay with this if they lived in the lower left quadrant of the compass. No post-left shit.
I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but the world is a sphere, Lemmy is a global network of instances, and without location context this comment makes no sense.
FrowingFostek is clearly in central Florida (USA), and hates the keys.
Or Russia and dislikes... all that over there.