I heard some Brit influencer I follow say it and I was like
They call canned whipped cream "squirty cream" and i have never stopped laughing
this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2026
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made me think of the shitshow that was the 2020 primary
cinema
NOT LEFT, NOT RIGHT, BUT FORWARD
deeply unserious island goblins
is this real or is it just eminently believable because brits are so fucking weird
Whipped cream is already a thing that isn't out of a can here. So to avoid confusion the stuff you squirt out of can is squirty cream - don't see the issue!
Exactly. Canned cream sounds like it's from a can, non pressurised. Sqiurty cream describes it exactly.
Yeah we do. Our language is full of whimsy, not going to apologise for it.
I think yall just make up these twee sayings to fuck with other English speakers. I used to work with a British lad and he'd just randomly say shit like "oi my tizzy welp is proper fussed for da queens biscuits!" And act like we all should have understood wtf he was saying.
Yeah that happens too. If you think it's codswallop, they might just be over-egging the pudding.
I'm not British and this is perfectly intelligible.
Old mate is being a galah and telling furphies.
or another way, if you reckon that if you had a butchers in Cobber's nut you'd find him a few flies short of a dunny 'cause of his doggeral: he might be pissing on your leg and telling you it's raining
Doggeral is adderal for dogs
If you had a squiz in old mates noggin on account of his lingo you'd see a few roos loose, or he may be having a lend of you
Edit: bit cringe but. I would use these independently but never as densely vernacular in a single sentence like the above
Yeah for sure. Wasn't sure about sticky beak vs butcher's either. Butchers is a bit rarer these days, along with apples.
Sticky beak for sure. Also one of my favourite picture books as a kid 
I just love rhyming slang though. Singlehandedly keeping it alive in my area.
I'm lost and I'm loving it!
Wind your neck in, swot.
Well there son, as a proper Merican fella, I ain't got no ider one which way or the or the other what in the chicken fried steak you be saying there.
They said if you think it's bs it's possible it's rich. I think.
Have British people always talked like this? Did every other group of anglophones leave and independently decide to cut it out with the nonsense?
yes, but no we all talk like complete idiots in different ways
Yes. We really do say it in the 19020s
So, 17000 years in the future?
You wouldn't get the joke, it's a 020's kid thing
Don't call yourself a 19020's kid if you were born in 19029.
It's like you don't even remember the Butleran Jihad, GOD
Yes. I was talking about the future in 19020. You have understood me perfectly
I figured it was a typo but was being cheeky
It wasn't a typo, I was actually talking about the future
If taskmaster is any indication, yes
It's self-censorship for "fuckety bye"
None of us can talk. Mog became a thing actual people said.
I've heard it used once. He was a very posh old man, who sort of made a character out of his extreme Britishness. He spoke the queen's English, but would also say things like 'zut-alors'. He was a teacher, but refused to use a phone, so one time the school bus was running late back from a football match and he didn't tell any of the parents. Mass panic ensued.
Someone at work used it in an email just this week, so yeah it's a thing people say. Especially if they're on a 4th re-watch of Red Dwarf, then it's all tickety-boo, lickety-split!
I laugh whenever I hear my Australian friend say they have to take out the wheelie bins.
Big wheels are wheels. Little wheels are wheelies. It's a bin with wheelies on it!