You are spot on about how therapy often blames you for acting like a victim. I was in rehab too, and I had a lot of great discussions about this topic in groups and with the councilors, in which we rarely agreed. I still think it is victim blaming what they are doing, and I disagree with a lot of things in the step-work they advertise. There is a lot of nuance in these things, and you have to understand they will over-exaggerate and magnify anything they say, in order to plant a seed in your mind, to induce friction, and make you think about it. The problem I had is that 95% of addicts in rehab go all the way with embracing the indoctrination, giving up their free will, and accept anything over which they are told to be 'powerless' in their environment.
This is the killer of critical thinking and creativity in my humble opinion. I just can't accept living like that. Feel empowered to make up your own mind, and be grateful for them tickling your senses and provoking new thoughts. But remember: you are not always one putting themselves in a victim role - even when they try to make you think you have been the bad guy all the time during your addiction. The Western world is a wider system that pushes sensitive people over the edge. That's not your fault, and I wouldn't let people tell you it was. I had a lot of shitty friends, teachers who humiliated me, and a disability as the cherry on top, navigating life in a world that did seem to make it absolutely clear I wasn't really welcome or fit in. I was the one causing 'them' problems!
That being said: Stay clean no matter what, bad days pass, cravings too. The most disrespectful thing to do to yourself is starting to use any substance or revert to behavior that only cause self-harm. Try a meeting, but don't worry if you think it feels like a cult. Just use it to get yourself going and drink a coffee with new people over there. You don't have to commit to doing things forever. I will promise you, after being almost 3-years clean: cravings fade, new habits come, and you will enjoy the freedom and sharp mind of being sober and trying new stuff in life. Be proud of yourself!
edit: Don't see this message as a defense of feelings of revenge or that holding a grudge is positive, that's absolutely not what I tried to say ;-) Grudge is a feeling only the person that sits with the grudge suffers from.