spoiler
I’m having really bad grief panic attacks and am genuinely not okay.
this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2026
10 points (100.0% liked)
Melbourne
2395 readers
32 users here now
This community is a place created for the people of Melbourne and Victoria. We are a positive, welcoming and inclusive community. We might not agree about everything, but we always strive to stay civil and respectful.
The focus of our discussions is based around things that affect Victoria, but we are also free to discuss our local perspective on wider issues. Or head to the regular Daily Random Discussion thread to talk about anything.
Ongoing discussions, FAQs & Resources (still under construction)
Adoption Certificate for Nellie, the Daily Thread numbat (with thanks to @Catfish)
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
So sorry. Hopefully the help lines can bring you some relief. A GP can do a mental health plan referral for a certain number of psychologist visits, I believe. Please look after yourself. You will get through this.
Would Nurse on Call be suitable? 1300 60 60 24
I’m calling the help lines
so many hugs
Do you have something you can do?
Had a lovely afternoon at the beach, soaking up the last of the warm weather.
i too did some beach, it's so mild out there
Goon show review
The Curse of Frankenstein starring Neddy Seagoon, Eccles, Bluebottle and Bloodnock
It was the silliest Frankenstein ever, 7 years at the South Pole and they didn do nuffin but clown around and play bagpipes
3 hobbits
beach
The boyfriend got me some flowers! Left them at his house accidentally, so I'm sure he'll be a good flower dad for the next week. He lives too far away :(
~~Unfortunately my mind automatically said, "What does he want? Is he trying to manipulate me?"~~
He likes hydrangeas and fiery roses. I don't know how I'll get my hands on those but I will be also surprising him with flowers some day.
The boyfriend
oooh it's official!
More than welcome to swing past mine and grab a few for him:
Can't help w/ roses though.
Jealous. I’ve never been able to grow hydrangeas successfully.
Thank you for the offer, will think about it and get back to you! Those are very pretty :)
The Lego flower kits are nice for another option.
I need an excuse to buy more Lego flowers!! Thanks for the suggestion :)
Yes! Nice sit at home & chat date activity. The smaller ones could also pub.
Having a lot of trouble cleaning lately. Life has been stressful and I have managed work sleep and food, and ok levels of outside and social time but I am in a deep funk when it comes to house chores. See one thing, see a second and third, brain overloads and I sit scrolling. Or today I come home ready to start and crash out asleep.
This is all ok EXCEPT that having a cluttered not clean place is pulling my mental health down. Ugh...I have a big tub to dump in anything out of place so I can try to clear and clean. Wish me luck.
Happens to lots of us. It’s called life. I find that putting on some headphones and listening to some upbeat music, or a podcast or audio book can make it less tedious and the time goes faster. But I know what you mean about starting. It’s sometimes hard to get motivated.
It happens. You work full time. Give yourself a break. And it's f'ing hot.
I wish you luck 🤞
Thanks mate. I appreciate it
I feel you.
Unsolicited advice on emergency/exhaustion cleaning
When I get like this it can help to dump everything in the big tub just to be able to vacuum… but then you have to sort out the tub or it just sits there. But it gets it out of the way so you can do it later.
Another way to gradually and easily declutter is to hang a plastic or paper bag on a doorknob and throw in a single unwanted item anytime you happen to find one. (I kept one on the wardrobe handle to immediately take anything I tried to put on and then decided not to keep.) Then when the bag is full donate. You can have multiple through the house.
Clean laundry I just pile into the ‘clean’ basket to pull from as needed or shove handfuls of the appropriate clothing into each drawer. I don’t always have the ability to put things away but I can shove them in the ‘general correct area’ or ‘contained’ and move on to more urgent tasks. I can always put them away properly later if I have the opportunity.
Disinfectant wipes or baby wipes are good to wipe up something sticky before sweeping or quickly go over a dusty or dirty surface as a stopgap.
I still hate the countertop dishwasher I invested in because it doesn’t clean to my standards but that is currently being used as the alternative to having a pile of rotting depression dishes.
Before I’d fill the sink with boiling soapy water and everything dirty, let it soak until it was just tolerably hot to wash… but if not done that runs the risk of a sink full of swamp water.
Stick vacs are not always great compared to full sized vacs, especially cordless ones. Cordless battery ones can run down fast and be weak. But they also are a lot easier to just grab for a quick pass when you have 5 seconds worth of motivation. You can use them on hard floors too, just swipe over the whole area.
When I empty the bin and have to replace the bag, I often put on multiple bags at once while I’m already doing it. It sucks but that way the next time I lift out the rubbish it’s already lined again ready to go. If I don’t do that I procrastinate and rubbish starts piling up on the counter…
Buying roach baits or making them from a 50/50 mix of sugar and borax in tinfoil ‘bowls’ helps if you’re living in an area where they tend to invade.
Pottering around semi-aimlessly cleaning in one area can help. Doing it drunk or high may help (though I unfortunately can’t have substances).
You don’t have to get it all done at once either. You can do 10 minutes or UFYH has mini challenges. (Watch out for the ads on the site tho, yeesh. I need to update my adblocker.) https://www.unfuckyourhabitat.com/
Also while high in sodium I always used to use tinned chunky soup as an emergency meal. Microwave in a bowl and serve with buttered bread, or even eat out of the tin if it’s that bad. Meat and veg with minimal cooking or cleanup
Thanks! I do a bunch of these but some are new and helpful. I need to declutter so have put tubs strategically around the place for stuff without a home. And luckily I don't have roaches here (my 18months of German roach hell from living next to a hoarder still makes me gag). I just managed a good hour while on the phone to a friend. Gonna do floors then meal prep now
I’m glad some of it helped. I definitely spend my fair share of time in (not) cleaning hell. Trying to catch up now myself.
I can’t stand for too long but sometimes it helped to put my phone on a mini easel I got from ebay and watch/listen to something while I washed in short chunks. Strongly advise putting it somewhere it can’t fall into the sink tho. I put it on the kitchen windowsill but well to the side
luck 🍀
also, Mission Creep is something I have had to learn to stop
I know the other stuff needs to be done too, I can leave it until my next specific cleaning day, the seagoons will be alright in the meantime, the chore hasn't been forgotten, there is a schedule
having a schedule for each room has really helped me . So now I just say, I know this hall area is a bit of a mess but it can wait until Wednesday, which is laundry and hallway day , eg Today I am just going to do the living and dining room.
I want to have a schedule but life has been chaotic with long work days and other health issues making me exhausted so I am trying to just do one thing every day even if tiny. Otherwise I feel terrible that I have broken the schedule 😔 thanks.
one thing everyday is very good 😊👍
when the young seagoons were here it was chaos and my schedule was in disarray
I learnt that having a schedule previously was really good because it wasn't chaos layered on chaos, it was just normal chaos, it didn't matter that life events took over for a bit
so this is life events, you are doing the important things and coping really well 👍😊😸😻🫂😘
Agreed, I just prioritise rubbish, ~~litter trays~~, dishes, anything that will smell or attract bugs. Those need quicker action than folding or ironing
Contemplating an order of ridiculous items to add to Lego Death Star. Balloon dog, pirate hat, and goat will absolutely make the list.
Do it.
Oh I will, it's just a matter of trimming the possible list 🥨🎸🎩
Is the yellow thing on the second floor pictured a bunch of bananas?
And yes, as SituationCake says, do it
Yes, pew pew
I looked up sexy cocktails for couples, found https://tipsybartender.com/drinks/sexy-drinks and got an education.
First harvest!
It's late and it's still fruiting heavily but I wonder if this thing can go 3 years.
That’s a humongous amount of chillis!
load more comments
(3 replies)
The black cat is coming back in my backyard again. He’s trilling, giving me tail hugs, caught a mouse and brought it over to show me (before eating it) and is trying to come inside 😬 He also ate grass and vomited, has a really snuffly nose, and I see little bald spots still.
spoiler
Crying over Melbcat while patting this one. The poses are similar but so different. I can almost hear the old lady groan she would make as he flops down. He’s a distraction from losing her but the pain is still there.
There’s an update though. He has owners! I was going to ask the one neighbour I don’t avoid but they were with one I do… finally I just put my big enby pants on and approached both. He lives around the corner and belongs to a couple who has another cat. One neighbour feeds him also sometimes.
I feel relief that I’m not solely responsible for him and he doesn’t need to be trapped. Unfortunately now I can’t really sort out his fungal jungle and will have to run the mushroom gauntlet every time I go out. And he still seems really neglected.
And I’ve broken the ice with a zero boundaries neighbour who I was trying to dodge 😬
Good news that black cat has owners and others looking out for him. Will hopefully be a burden off your mind.
It is! I was so worried what would happen if I moved away or got too sick to look out for him.
Still I don’t think he’s getting proper care 💔 I hate it when people get pets and ignore them.
Looking at news sites a person could think One Nation won the SA election
except Labor won by a landslide, ON just increased their small vote , which was probably more a lost Liberal vote than a ON vote
the bias of reporting is just incredible 😧
They were never going to form government, but One Nation has been very successful for a minor party. It’s gonna make the news. They didn’t win any seats, but they got 20% of the primary vote. That’s huge. More than the liberals got. It’s upended election norms. This isn’t going to go away quietly. Lots of far right wing sentiment out there, and it’s growing.
Going to see a little pair of ginger boys today at a foster. It feels so gauche. But Cerys really isn't doing well on her own, she's never been a lone cat
A pair of gingers is a good idea. They can annoy and entertain each other, and Cerys can join in if she feels but she won't be their primary source of entertainment.
And remember that your heart isn't pie, divided up into slices of love. With each new creature we meet and love, it grows to fit them in and Misha's place in there is forever.
We knew we had three criteria:
-
boys as they really don't get hierachical like females and just roll over and accept being the bitch
-
younger, for similar ease of introduction / hierarchy reasons
-
two to annoy each other at their energy levels instead of Cerys. So we started looking at bonded pairs.
We would have loved to adopt an older pair, but they're all set in their ways and we'd basically just be upsetting three elderly cats for human morality.
It’s ok. You’re trying to comfort your girl 🫂
load more comments
(2 replies)
What a chill day.
Tomorrow I'll find out if work will give me the flick because of this whole heart episode. Of course they'll make up some other reason.
Eh. I've got multiple interviews next week and I'm comfy for the moment.
load more comments
(3 replies)
view more: next ›