I guess I’ll be sitting on the ground now.

Finally, I'm inside my wife.

Wall.

My head would hit a metal chair.

I sit on the floor, despite a chair being there.

I fall 2 feet onto my bed. I'm lying on my right side, browsing Lemmy from a tablet right now.

I fell off the bed and got a nasty hit on my head against the bedside table. Thanks, I guess?

I no longer have a cat laying on my back.

A chunk of file cabinet where my knee was falls to the floor. I fall to the ground, twisting my hip joint quite uncomfortably, possibly enough to pull something. I can't actually tell if my leg would be totally trapped, or if I could at least slide it out. If it's caught it's going to be a shitty wait for rescue.

Other side of my couch

Sitting in the driver seat of my car so I'd transfer to the passenger seat.

I went from sitting in my Jeep in my garage to falling a couple feet onto the floor. Otherwise no issues.

SOMEONE FUCKING HELP ME I'M STUCK IN THE FUCKING WALL

I just fell off the couch.

I'll end up lying on the floor of the store room. No thank you for my butt hurting me.

Taking a dump in my neighbors hallway

I I am now sitting on nothing in the walkway through my living room. I fall on my butt on the carpet, severely swear, and then try for a bit to figure out what the hell just happened.

I would be in the other chair.

Death

I am now sitting on the roof of my house. Is a bit damp, but could be worse.

My upper body has fused with an ICEE machine.