this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2026
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History Memes

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A place to share history memes!

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Laconia (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago by tgirlschierke@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/historymemes@piefed.social
28 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Context for the last line: Instant loss 2-koma is a genre of (usually NSFW) anime art divided into two panels, with a character proudly proclaiming something on the first panel and then being proven incredibly wrong on the second.

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[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 53 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Yeah, the Spartans were not the badass, invincible, freedom loving people pop culture makes them out to be. They regularly got their asses handed to them and the reason they had such a massive army was to ensure that their slaves (the helots) didn't get uppity.

[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You mean to tell me Hollywood lied to us? Say it ain’t so!!

[–] MBech@feddit.dk 13 points 1 month ago

What's next? They didn't paint 6-packs on themselves???

[–] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's so. If you would care to read more about it, I can highly recommend this blog https://acoup.blog/2019/08/16/collections-this-isnt-sparta-part-i-spartan-school/

[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Goddamnit. This really kills any idea that we as a species might be redeemable. It’s just rinse and fucking repeat over many millennia. Sigh.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 5 points 1 month ago

In my view, taking the Spartan myth down a few pegs is redemptive - for those of us who have not benefited from the fraud. It's nothing but false machismo and literal rape culture that have only served to give comfort to societies built on cruelty and inequality.

You're not wrong to feel that humans can be tiresome in their follies, but charitably, some of that must be caused by familiarity. We're the species whose entire evolutionary niche is cooperation and friendliness. Most of the animal kingdom are jerks by any fair comparison. If we had lived as ants, our grievances about our peers would be all the more bleak.

[–] bearboiblake@pawb.social 3 points 1 month ago

We need to stop letting people rule. No gods, no kings.

[–] khannie@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

In addition, the first time the deep phalanx was successful was against Sparta. The Macedonians immediately yoinked the idea.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 37 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Sparta is possibly the great exception to "the winner writes history" rule. Fuckers were absolute assholes left and right, only had a good k/d ratio against their own slaves and thought writing was "for those sissy Athenians", yet they're still seen as this mythical nation of uber warriors, not to mention that their biggest claim to fame in modern day culture is a battle they lost.

[–] bearboiblake@pawb.social 24 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I can't imagine why our modern fascist society lionizes a militaristic death cult. Someone should look into that.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

They aren't the exception, they're the proof it's wrong.

The victors don't write history, historians write histories.

[–] Tiresia@slrpnk.net 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Lots of historians have had their work altered or destroyed, so that doesn't work either.

The common understanding of Sparta is like the Wild West; Sparta operated as a theme park for several centuries while under Roman occupation, and that theme park's marketing was so popular that it displaced the plentiful historical records of them eating shit from the public consciousness.

No matter what historians say, Spartans will continue to exist as a hypermasculine warriors just like knights will continue to exist as chivalrous gentlemen and like cowboys will continue to exist like badass gunslingers. Because in the end,

History is written by the advertisers.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Kind of like saying authors don't write the novels fanfictions are based on imo

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

angry Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way noises

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

From an extremely defensible position no less

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 9 points 1 month ago

A battle the Greeks thought they would win and their whole plan counted on.

[–] AngryishHumanoid@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Usually NSFW you say?

[–] ruuster13@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

But in an r/50/50 way?

[–] Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I know laconic just means pithy and cutting, but I vote that it should also have the meaning of ‘guy who says something they think makes them look very cool and immediately gets their shit wrecked’

[–] natecox@programming.dev 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You missed the beginning of this transaction, where Phillip sends Sparta a missive asking if he should come as friend or enemy, and the response he got was “neither”.

[–] kata1yst@sh.itjust.works 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's right there

[–] natecox@programming.dev 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh hahaha it got cropped.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

you missed the part where he said if

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 2 points 1 month ago

Talk shit, get hit