I have a theory. When I was interning with a volunteer group, there was this lovely older lady I was working with; like many groups we used computers for a lot of our tasks and (I think) Windows 7 had just come out. This lady was very much not the type to make her problems everyone else's but I remember her excitedly telling about how she was learning the new process of things on 7, in contrast to Vista. She showed me the step-by-step notes she'd taken to open particular app.s, detailing opening the start menu and where to clickbto find them. Having recently discovered Linux (and desperate to share the good news), I thought she might find my setup somewhat similar and wanted to get her opinion. I figured it'd be pretty similar (open menu; I figured simply searching for the app.'s name would be easier for her than the many steps she was taking) but, right as I typed the first character of the app.'s name, she exclaimed, "Nope! This is too much!" She said it jovially, clearly as in, "Thanks for trying but I'm overwhelmed, already," but I was struck by how much she was clearly going about this as concrete, manual steps rather than putting together a sense of a general UI.
And, for whatever reason, reading through this thread made me think of appliances.
They're always different. Even similar devices, like a microwave, can have a differing UI that can provide unexpected results with little explanation because, well, lack of availsble physical space (as an example, quick microwaving; that threw me for a loop the first time I used one and pressing 2 immediately kicked off microwaving for 2 minutes). If I was using someone else's microwave, no one would begrudge me asking how it works.
Of course, many of these devices come with manuals. I'm not certain how my husband's coffee maker works but I could figure it out, if need be. I'm definitely not saying that the reactions of some older people aren't beyond the pale.
But I think, for some, they're thinking of it like another person's microwave (this more applies to those who generally don't use smart phones, etc. themselves); except a phone or computer is much more complicated so they never quite fully learn it. And, despite their attempts to avoid it, they're becoming exceedingly more integral to our ways of operating because of how easy they make doing things. No one would bat an eye at someone who reheats everything on the stove because they don't like microwaves (or no one gives me a side eye because I prefer to cook rice in a pot on the stove, like my mother taught me to do it, rather than use a rice cooker).
But we're all extremely cognizant when Ethel doesn't want to E-mail the forms because she likes writing by hand.
I dunno; I definitely think therecs a lor of malicious learned ignorance that a lot of people here have clearly encountered but I suspect that the reason "this is the way it's been for 3 decades, now" isn't effective is they're still thinking it's yet another someone's microwave; and every appliance has a different UI (very much less true with smart phones and computers); they don't want to learn it for the (supposedly) only 5 minutes they need to use it. And the frustration that it's not more intuitive builds (unlike with a particular microwave) because (for some bizarre reason~) they keep running into scenarios where they're expected to use it.
